Falling in Love From A Boy's Point of View Redo
by SasuNaru Fangirl Seme
Summary: Redone completely! What's it like to fall in love from a boy's point of view, aside from the usual girl's? Contains SasuNaru. Happy birthday, Love!
1. Prologue Naruto's Problem

Completelyy and wholly redone. It's one thousand times better.** I'm so so so SO sorry I flooded my subscribers with new chapters of an old story, but bear with me and try to either reread or ingore them.** Thank you!

* * *

I found myself staring at him all the time.

I always wonder why, and have a few conclusions. None of them seem to fit.

So, conclusion number one. You're glaring, and you're just staring at him because he's an ass.

But I'm not glaring, I know it. I find myself…well, I wouldn't say admiring. He looks good, even when we're training. At one point, I found myself staring at him doing simple things like drinking out of water bottles or writing papers. He looked good doing _that_. This brings me to conclusion number two. He's good looking, damn it! There is nothing wrong with thinking that. I'm a teenager with hormones and opinions on other people's looks. I'm probably just jealous he looks so good and Sakura wants him and not me.

But I'm not jealous. I stare at him because I love the way he looks. If I ever get jealous of or over him, it's because he saved Sakura from some rogue ninja. It's not just his looks now that I consider this. It's him. Sure he acts like a jerk, but he's smart, calm, smooth, and noble to some degree. He's saved my life countless times, too. I always tell him he's just a show off and I can take care of myself, even though I probably would have been killed had he no been there.

Then of course, although we never talked about it…

We're both alone.

We're both orphans. We both grew up without friends and with very little human contact. However, it's never bothered me as much. I never knew my parents, so I guess I never knew what it was like to have them. Sasuke's were killed by his brother. His brother he loved and looked up to. I had never had a brother, either.

I sometimes wonder how Sasuke really feels and who he really is. His personality reflects nothing like what you'd expect someone's too who had gone through that. I'm sure it was just because Sakura, Kakashi and I are around most of the time. But what does he do when he's alone?

This brings me to conclusion number three.

You _like_ him. As in, standard teenage meaning of the word.

But that's not possible. I liked Sakura, not Sasuke, much less men in general.. I just care about him, I pity him. I respect him. I love him, sure. Love is an easy word for me. I love him because he's my best friend. Not that other way.

I'm sure.


	2. The Dumbest Mission EVER

"Ah, are you kidding, Kakashi-Sensei!?" I whined, and not just because it was a part of my usual attitude. I mean, really. This mission had to take the cake for dumbest mission award. If we had one of those. That, or, rescuing the cat.

"Nope, I'm not." Kakashi was smiling underneath the mask, although we couldn't actually see. Gloating, no doubt. He never participated in our missions, just _supervised._

"Dishes, Sensei?" Sakura asked sweetly. "Shouldn't the Hyugga's be doing their own dishes?" She came off as innocent, but I knew she was screaming somewhere in side. Kakashi shook his head, causing us - Sakura and I both to slump our shoulders.

Sasuke, stoic as he was and much better at hiding his annoyance than Sakura, just stood there. _Which_ caused me to look up, stare for a moment, then turn back. "Uhn, let's just go," I growled, walking. Sasuke and Sakura reluctantly followed me, Sakura grumbling so low she thought she went unnoticed. Kakashi waved, disappearing suddenly.

So we were going to _dishes_. Damn it sucked so _bad_ to be Genin.

"If you two quit complaining, the job will get done faster." Sasuke muttered behind us, probably surprising Sakura, who had been trying to hide her distaste.

This caused me to stare at him again, but I barely turned my head back for fear of being caught. His voice was just as good as his looks. If you didn't know any better, you would have thought he was just a tiny thing, years beyond puberty, what with his rich voice.

"You are sooo right, Sasuke!" Sakura beamed, hands clasping together in front of her chest. Sasuke made a 'Tch' sound, and continued following.

--------

"Naruto, you collect them off the tables, Sakura will wash and I'll dry." Sasuke deadpanned, picking up an off-white towel. The pile of dishes was eminent in the room, looking endless to our unwilling eyes.

I complied wordlessly, making shadow clones to get my job done quicker.

I usually didn't go without making some comment to Sasuke about bossing me around, but I didn't care at the moment. I'm sure the same though crossed there minds, wondering why I hadn't. Oh well. I continued, laying the dishes down one by one beside Sakura, said girl picking them up and scrubbing them, Sasuke finishing, drying and stacking.

Suddenly - and I was picking up dishes so I had no idea how - Sasuke gasped and cut it short himself, growling. I turned my head from my stack of growing dishes to see Sasuke with the front of his shirt doused, darkening the already navy blue material.

"Sa-Sasuke, I'm so sorry!" Sakura squeaked, reaching for another towel, but her movements were clumsy and too slow for Sasuke's cooperation.

"It's fine…" Sasuke suppressed his real thoughts with effort. Pulling his shirt away from his body slightly, he glided towards the table we had left our bags on, and tore a new black shirt from his grey backpack. I starred without a catch, but instantly turned because he took his soiled shirt off, and shoved it back into his bag, still shirtless. He ignored Sakura's squeal in the background, and pulled the new black one over his head. His inky black spikes still appeared untouched.

What in _the_ hell?

I had seen Sasuke and plenty of other men topless before. That was totally normal.

"I'm really sorry, Sasuke!" Sakura said through giggles. She was probably having her own fantasies, now that she had seen the Uchiha topless. That had to have been a secret dream of hers.

"Tch- Shut up." He hissed, picking the towel back up.

Sakura turned her head down and continued, even more so embarrassed now, and upset with herself since she had defiled her favorite boy.

With the dishes finished, we were all ready to head home.

So Sakura, for the third time this week - and the sixtieth time in her life - made a sad, sorry attempt at getting Sasuke out on a date. Anything to have the Uchiha alone.

I'm staring.

"Sasuke, I'm so, so sorry about today." But nonetheless, she was sincere, and this was the perfect excuse. I already knew what she would say. Sasuke just stood silently, arms crossed. "I was just being clumsy, and- and I was, well, hoping I could maybe…make it up to you." She drawled on her sentence.

"I don't need anymore apologies," He replied flatly, not giving her any sympathy. "I'm just going to go home. Stop worrying," He said, already beginning to turn.

"Oh, Okay…" Her gaze drifted to her feet as it often did after this rejection.

Sakura waved goodbye to me. Goodbyes after missions were the only time she was ever _really_ kind to me, and it was always after Sasuke was long gone. Because, reflective to the ninja he was, he departed quickly and discreetly.

Maybe we weren't _all_ ready to go home.

I was ready to leave, but not ready to get home to what might be waiting for me there. Be it a sleepless night or an actual person. The thought made me shiver. I waited especially long and watched Sakura's back disappear completely from sight before I so much as moved.

I had a history of frequent nightly attacks, verbal, physical - and in small doses, but nothing serious - sexual abuse. If that's what you could call it. There weren't words to describe what people had done to me, at least not ones that I could say out loud. It was because of what I was. I was a Jinchuruki, a breed of human that carried a tailed beast.

I shook on the way home, though I should have been used to this by now. I approached my top floor apartment after a few flights of concrete steps, and so far, so good. Nothing outside but my frog welcome mat.

I released the held breath in my lungs, and slowly pushed open the door.

Waited,

Then sighed. _No one_.

I sighed again, more than relived. I untied my headband and tossed it on the ground, my jacket followed shortly after. As usual, I had no motivation to put them away, despite knowing I'd be scrambling for them in the morning. I stopped immediately, and bolted back around to lock my door. Another sigh.

"Crappy day, I had to do stupid dishes…" I muttered to myself.

In all honesty, I wasn't _really_ ready to sleep, but neither training nor eating sounded appealing. There was one thing that could have sparked my appetite though, at any time in any situation…

A fist hitting wood filled my ears. I smiled, instantly knowing Iruka's quick, short knock by heart. I didn't fear for a moment who was on the other side of my front door. I bolted towards it…"Hi, Iruka-Sensei!" I slammed the door open, seeing him smile and rub the back of his head, high ponytail shifting.

"Wow, Hi." He grinned.

I gave him my same, confident smile and look that screamed, 'Will you please buy me ramen?' This had turned into a usual. When Iruka had both the money and the time, he would come to me after a mission offering a sort of Mentor to student meeting - and heavenly food.

"Kakashi told me you had a boring mission today." He was still smiling, but now it was a tad sarcastic. "I was thinking -"

"That you would buy me ramen!?" I asked, putting my guardian's thought out loud.

He laughed, "Of course I will!"

"Score!" I rocketed into a turn, nearly missed my jacket on the ground but picked it up, then swung it on my arms in one fluid movement. My frightened mood from earlier had completely dissipated.

Iruka was like the dad I never had, and the only close adult in my life. So I told him everything without fear of being judged, wronged or unloved. Naturally, he knew about Sasuke and my sudden interest in his physique. But _only _that. I hadn't told him about my new _feelings_.

The trip to Ichiraku's - our favorite and perhaps the entire country's favorite ramen shop - was short, and there was no one in line, so we got to chow down as quickly as the noodles were severed.

"I've been working a lot, so I haven't talked to you in quite awhile. How is everything?" Iruka asked in-between slurps.

Swallowing, I answered, "Uhn, Okay, I suppose. I want to go on some cooler missions." This was also a usual.

He smiled knowingly. He gave me the same answer every time I said this. "Every mission is important, Naruto. What about your team?"

"Sakura is good," It was automatic, simply to hide the thoughts of Sasuke his words had instantly surfaced. I pictured his face, the simplest way to convey my thoughts. Raven black hair framed his alabaster features and endless obsidian eyes…This naturally lead me to his whole body. He was tall and lean, Somewhat larger than me - more so in height, because or builds were similar - perfectly proportioned…But his expression, just -

"And Sasuke?"

I swallowed another bite of ramen, setting the chopsticks on the ridge of the now empty bowl. "He's… Normal." It sounded like question.

"Do you still find yourself staring at him?" Iruka asked gently. "Kakashi tells me he sees you a lot."

I nodded. I knew it was impossible to hide from Kakashi. "Iruka-Sensei, I care about Sasuke. But…I don't…I hardly know him as a person. His looks just…kind of…"

Iruka was quiet for a moment, for I trailed off and didn't continue. "Well, why do you stare at him?"

"Because he look's really goo-" I started, tripping on my speech. "I mean-" I gasped. "Well…um…" Unfortunately, I couldn't fix my slip.

"It's okay if you like the way he looks." Iruka half smiled. "But is that the only reason?" He asked.

I considered his question carefully. No was the answer, but I needed other reasons. "No, of course not. It's one of the reasons…but sometimes, Ruka-"

He waited with complete patience, only pausing a half second to lay money for the meal on the counter.

"He looks…" More thinking. "Kind of sad. Well, I wouldn't say sad, his expression just changes. From annoyed or blank, to maybe…" I tried to think of the best word. "Disappointed. But whenever looks at him, his expression is annoyed again." No, this wasn't from his past, or simply his slight pain from his dead family, I was sure this was something else. Something I had just thought back on, and barely remembered noticing.

Iruka motioned for me to stand up, willing to walk me safely home. Normally he wouldn't, but he obviously wanted to continue the conversation. "Well, he is alone, and that's hard on children, even Sasuke."

"But I know that's not it. It's something else." I paused, realizing something I hadn't before. He looked that way when -

Without me knowing it, we had arrived at the bottom of my flight of steps.

"I should probably get home. Is there anything else you want to tell me?" Iruka asked, his beam back on his face. The sun was almost completely gone at this point, but I could still see, thanks to a lone street lamp that would be going off any minute.

"No." I lied, uneasily dropping the conversation. "Thanks so much for the ramen!" With one last wave, I was up the steps and inside my apartment again. This time, I was willing to sleep. Early sleep was a given, never knowing what I was in store for in the next morning. My jacket had already resumed it's position on the floor. I pulled off my shirt, fishing around in my bedroom for a softer night shirt. I put it on, followed by my bed cap. I flicked the lights off and climbed into bed, pulling my sheets up over my head.

I laid awake until I could hardly open my eyes. He gets like that when-

It's Sakura and I.


	3. Sasuke, Nice?

My head wasn't on the pillow anymore. I clutched the fluff against my side, like hugging it, and buried my face against the fabric. Yells of threats, curses and other slurs echoed from outside my apartments. On nights when there wasn't someone bold enough to come in and physically attack me, a verbal abuse from outside my locked doors and windows suited them just fine.

Crying never made anything better, but it was impossible to stop the salty liquid's flow.

_Maybe if you used me, they'd be six feet under by now._

Kyubbi had roused with my crying. Being sealed inside my body, he was with me both mentally and physically, and communicate with me like a literal conscious, though I had only discovered this a shirt while ago, despite having him in there since birth.

_It's because of you they hate me, anyway._

_Suit yourself._

Kyubbi healed my wounds and gave me boundless energy and Chakra. Twelve years ago he had destroyed half of our village and taken many lives, and unable to kill the worlds most powerful monster, they had sealed it inside me. He was rude, and I hated the fact he was in my body, but he took care of me. I didn't mind Kyubbi, just the effects that came with him.

These people would stop hurting me if Kyubbi was gone.

********************

The next morning we didn't have any missions, but Kakashi did, and he'd be absent for awhile. He left us to train, _us _meaning Sasuke and I. Sakura never spared with us, she trained in control when Kakashi was around, and was more like Sasuke's cheerleader.

But in the beginning, we weren't practicing. We were standing - or in Sakura's case - sitting around our usual, grassy meeting grounds.

I'm still trying to interpret the conclusion I made last night. Maybe it was just a coincidence. But in reality, that's always when it happened, no matter how far fetched the thought was. My first idea, - and this is _so_ ridiculous - was that he secretly returned Sakura's affection, and got jealous when I was with her. That was definitely not it. It was sad how I had even came up with it. I have a hard time thinking about the other idea.

Sasuke gets that unnamable disappointed look, because I'm not with him. I'm wanting Sakura.

That can't be it either, though. That was nearly as bad as the first idea. _Worse._ I tried to assure myself. And he doesn't even know I see it. He's never even noticed me watching him, and how that was possible for Sasuke, I didn't know. I must have been getting stealthy.

"Are we standing here all day, or practicing?" Sasuke called suddenly, shaking me from my thoughts.

"We're practicing!" I yelled, trying to forget. Normally, we just performed hand to hand, zero jutsu combat. We were trying to improve, not injure each other, much less kill each other.

So it started. Sakura was sitting, tallying who got more hits on who. I'm never distracted - by him, anyway - when we sparred. I always try to prove myself around Sasuke. I strived to be just like Sasuke, and when that finally happens - better. But I had catching up to do.

This continued for hours, with small time-outs and breaks on Sakura's call. She noticed when we got tired or overly agitated. Kakashi was supposed to be gone for three to four days. I was planning while fighting near the end, considering taking a break and hanging out tomorrow.

"Let's call it a day, you two." Sakura called suddenly, the sun just beginning to disappear, a haze of purple-pink in the sky. I threw one last punch at Sasuke's face, but he ducked like I had moved a turtles pace.

"Who won!?" I cried.

Sakura smirked similar to Sasuke, but nearly as well. "Sasuke got more hits on you, Naruto! You are so awesome!" Sakura added, nodding towards the Uchiha.

I growled and spun around to glare at him, a good cover up.

"Maybe someday you'll win." He ignored Sakura and spoke t me directly. It didn't seem like gloating or sarcasm. Stupefied, I said nothing in response.

"Hey, are you guys really coming back tomorrow? I was thinking we could break for a day…" Sakura trailed off, awaiting either our approval or disapproval.

You break when we fight, and yet you want the day off, I thought, then tried to quickly erase it. I liked Sakura less and less every day.

"I'm staying at home," Sasuke answered.

"That was my plan too!" I agreed.

"Maybe all three of us could go do something!" Sakura interjected. _With me? _I thought, shocked at the idea of Sakura wanting to have fun with all three of us like real friends, and not simply Sasuke.

"…Like?" Sasuke finally managed.

"I don't know…Something." She looked up at the haze to think.

I _loved_ the idea, but could think of nothing to do. "I have no ideas, just to go get ramen." I shook my head, already knowing their answers. "Like you guys want to do that."

Nobody else had a plan. Minutes floated by, yet all of three showed no impatience. Even Sasuke seemed to be considering, for both he and I fell slack at different points to sit down, him against a tree and me beside him on the grass.

"I'm going to head, come tell me tomorrow if you have any ideas." Sakura said suddenly, walking away with a wave. I almost got up to follow suit, but I realized Sasuke hadn't moved. That was curious.

When Sakura disappeared from Sasuke's long line of sight, breathe out as if he had been holding it all day. For some reason, I'm sure he actually had been. "Finally."

"That's not very nice Sasuke," I murmured.

"I know you like her, but look at how she acts around me. I can barely stand it." He replied, as if it was some kind of excuse that I had a crush on her.

It hit me before I could even reply angrily. Sasuke had just spoken to me in a situation that involved neither mission strategy nor an argument. He had spoke to me like a friend or a brother really would, and that was unnatural.

"I don't like her like _that_!" I hissed.

"Yeah right," He scoffed. _That_ look spread across his face.

Sasuke wasn't treating me like crap? We were having a human conversation? This got more unnatural, no - more inhuman - by the second.

"You're my friend. Look at the way I act around you."

"Hardly!" But there hadn't been a single trace of usual sarcasm in Sasuke's deep tone. "She's different! You're supposed to treat ladies nicer! And if we're friends…" I paused. Woops, too fast, no answer.

"Yeah?"

"You could actually act like it!" I answered defiantly, with only a moment's hesitation.

"I was getting to that."

Whoa. No, 'you started hating me first?'

He waited, like he was considering his words carefully. "We could do something tomorrow. You know, like guy friends do. Hang out." Guy was conveniently in the place of boy, and I knew that's why he had to plan the sentence in his head. What an embarrassing slip up _that _would have been.

I'm sure my mouth would have visibly dropped open had Sasuke not been sitting in front of me, much less watching me expectantly. Now, before the, oh my god, I was wondering how in the hell the - literally - socially retarded Sasuke defined, 'hanging out.' Then there was the Oh. My. God. Sasuke? Are you sick? Are you acting like a normal male human your age? "What about Sakura?" I managed, dumbfounded.

"She's annoying. Girls just get in the way, and all she's going to do is flirt with me. I don't want her there." It was strange, but this was reasonable. Like two natural friends, one complaining to the other about a girl. But coming from Sasuke? _Why _had Sasuke opened up like this was the most normal thing in the world? "Unless you aren't alright with-" He cut himself off.

"What?" I probed, suspicious.

"Being around me." It was so low he could barely hear.

Was he _lonely_? Is that why he was acting so strange and amenable?

I swallowed, ignoring his last statement subtly. "What do you want to do?" The million dollar question. Certainly not eat ramen - the only thing I could ever think of.

He gave a half-hearted shrug. "Whatever you want."

"…Um, well…" I thought for a few minutes. I had a feeling he would leave it up to me. "I don't exactly…" Oh, quit stuttering, you - "I barely know you." I felt a little guilty having to say it, but it was unfortunately accurate. "Can we just…talk? You know, have a meeting?" Sheesh, that was dumb. Why did I have to sound like an idiot _now_?

But he didn't point out my clumsy wording. "Alright, where?"

I was confused myself as to why I wasn't acting hyper, or why I hadn't freaked out on the suddenly abnormal Sasuke. What had happened to my Naruto-ness?

"How about here?" How boring. I couldn't think of anything better, then afterwards imagined being seen by someone we knew in some public place in Konoha. Anyone who knew the dynamics of our relationship would have jumped us, for fear of Sasuke doing something bad.

He got up abruptly without answering, so I copied him. "I'll see you here tomorrow. Noon?"

"Sure." I _think._


	4. Demon Secret

No one was in my house that same night, and there weren't any screams and hollers from outside. Comforted by this, I fell asleep easily. But the time I spent training before bed had my head consumed with the afternoon. I hadn't acted normal, and Sasuke had acted inhuman. Above all else, we were going to - hopefully - act like real friends for once? Tomorrow? That exited me, and despite everything else I was looking forward to noon.

I awoke at nine and slowly went through a shower, a change, a ramen and milk breakfast, and a teeth brushing, etc. When I finished getting ready, it was ten. I had hoped my slowness would drag out until time, but apparently it was against me. I wished Iruka wasn't at work, then I could chat with him to prepare myself.

I practiced hitting targets - not the norm and nothing too strenuous - while I waited for noon to get closer. It was like studying some impossible jutsu to come up with what I should say, even more so what Sasuke would bring up. Who _knew?_ It was sad, but we had never had trivial - or not so trivial - talks like this before.

That made me wonder something else. He was still calm, collected Sasuke, but he wasn't being a jerk, didn't have his pissed off Uchiha air around him, and was sincere with everything he said.

Naturally, Sasuke was there first, even though I was right on schedule. The sun was directly above us since it was afternoon, and the tree Sasuke sat under wasn't exactly shading, but worthy to lean against. As I walked closer, I tried to keep my eyes on his feet. He looked really good in the sunlight. His skin - if only slightly - seemed to reflect the light, but not in a bad way. He seemed to glow. With a short, barely coherent greeting, I fell slack to the ground diagonal to him.

"So you wanted to talk," I jumped slightly at his voice, for some time had passed before he spoke. It wasn't a question. It was more of a cue to start.

Like I was built for it, and only half a second after he asked, I had the question formulated. This was a given and a little obvious, but it came quickly, so it was worth asking without fear of being flustered. "Why - other then now - are you always such a jerk? I'm not accusing you, just why?" This whole time I knew - I would be starring at him whenever he wasn't watching. Any glance I could possibly steal outside of his gaze.

He smirked, and a tiny iota of relief washed through me. _That_ was normal. "The same reason you're hyper - other then now -" He mocked. "It's part of my built up personality. Part of who I am, I suppose."

Damn it, that was true.

"My turn," Sasuke murmured, only thinking for a second. We must have been going back and forth with questions. "Why do you like Sakura so much? What do you even see in her?" There was the look again.

I growled instantly, "I don't like her like _that_, Sasuke!" That was an obviously automatic reaction, but anymore, it really wasn't just bluffing. More and more, I saw Sakura as a best friend, and undeniably a teammate, but nothing else.

"Really?" He sounded apprehensive at first, but when I nodded, remaining quiet, he loosened up. "Then I want another. _Do_ you love anyone, like that?"

I swallowed hard. This was not like Sasuke at all. Sasuke wouldn't normally ask that, or anything like it. "If I did, I wouldn't tell you!" I shot back. But then again, maybe I would.

Sasuke scoffed, "Speak openly. I'm not going to judge you."

I glared at him skeptically, then uttered, "Okay, No. I don't. My turn."

I considered my question carefully. More than anything, I wanted to dig deeper. I knew about Sasuke's attitude, his personality, his daily life - at least, when he was with me - But I didn't know his secrets, his real feelings, or anything else buried beneath the surface.

"Who do you love, like that?" Would the answer be a person specifically?

Sasuke was silent for a half a second too long. "No one." I noticed. It could have been a lie, but then again, maybe he was just embarrassed there wasn't anyone.

I was soundless again. Since Sasuke didn't say anything, I guessed he wanted me to go again. My next question took a bit more thinking. When wanting to get deeper, the first thing that popped into my head was the massacre of his clan - including all of his family. Sasuke must have been little, but the memory must also be burned there. I knew a perfect, indirect question. "Do you have nightmares a lot?" I tried to same them as gently as possible.

His expression changed from relaxed and collected to something I couldn't read at all instantly. "Yeah. Do you?" His voice was quiet and almost weak.

"Every night." I whispered. "What are they about?"

I could tell I was opening up a touchy subject. Sasuke's fists clenched and unclenched lightly, and his exterior visibly broke down, slowly but surely. Likewise, I'm sure he would ask me the same question if I got the answer out of him, and I would probably be just the same. "I don't want to tell you."

"We're speaking openly." I reminded him, but the mocking I expected hadn't made it past my lips.

He didn't move or breathe momentarily, and for a moment I thought he'd lose it. Then he took a long breath in, let it back out, and started. What kind of visuals had I just awakened in his head?

"About my family being murdered." I was right. "It's the same dream every night. There's every regret I have before the murder, and then the _replay_." He shuddered. The small movement made me realize I _really _shouldn't have asked. "Their blood…and the screams. Blood." He got visibly woozy. "…Ita-" An unfamiliar sound ended his broken speech, and then he couldn't go on. He clutched at his head, and it looked as if he would have screamed, had I not been there.

"Sasuke!" I half cried half questioned. He snapped his head up form it's tilted downwards position. I shouldn't have asked, that was clear. His eyes were wide and his hands trembled on his head.

"I didn't mean to bring up-" I started.

"Don't talk about it anymore." He interrupted. His hands fell back to his sides and he calmed down, breaths coming short but not in pants.

It took some time for him to settle. Then, as if it hadn't happened in the first place, "What are yours about? don't tell me if you're going to react like I did."

"No." I shook my head. I felt horrible now. "They're about people. In my dreams, I'm alone and it's dark. People come and, they - try to kill me. They use their fists and knives. They think I'm a disease, some kind of monster." Really. It had been going for as long as I could remember, so it didn't outwardly show when I clarified.

"Why?" Sasuke asked, leaning forward. His fixed eyes showed nothing, but his tone was concerned.

But I couldn't answer his question. To me, this was more personal to me than anything we'd both said put together, adding anything we may say later. Besides, I was just telling him about what happened in my dreams. He didn't need to know that those things actually happened in reality, much less _why_.

"They hate me," I replied softly.

Sasuke got closer, to my slight discomfort. Other than when we were sparing, I didn't think there had even been a time when such a short distance was between us. "Why do they hate you? What makes them think you're a monster?"

"I don't know really know." I didn't sound convincing. Crap…

_Just tell him, Kit._

_He's gonna hate me, Kyubbi! Just like everyone else!_

_How do you know? Haven't you told me before that Sasuke's the only one who doesn't judge you?_

_But if he knows, that might change!_

_Then lie._

_YOU ARE NOT HELPING!_

"But you _do_." He prodded. "Why won't you tell me?" He moved a barely noticeable distance closer.

I swallowed the lump and the pathetic noise that might have been a whine or a whimper. He was winning. I couldn't get away with lying to him. "Because you'll hate me!"

Sasuke narrowed his eyes, now. "Why would I hate you?" He seemed to be asking himself or his mentality the question more than me. "Just - I won't be angry -"

"O-okay!" I started. I couldn't lie anymore, not to Sasuke. Something knotted up in my throat, and my chest felt like someone was crushing it. Someone heavy. He would end up like everyone else who knew the secret. He'd despise me. "Remember when we were in the academy, and we took history courses?"

Sasuke nodded. His eyes were hazed with confusion at my seemingly new topic.

"Remember how -" I gulped. "-The Nine tailed fox demon destroyed half of our village? How it's tails could reach the moon and could level mountains?" I emphasized it's power, preparing for how this power was all trapped in my body. "And the Fourth Hokage defeated it?"

I could tell by looking at him, he didn't know what I was getting to. He was missing a chunk, and had no idea why my topic had changed. "Well, he didn't destroy It. It's still alive."

Sasuke believed me without interrogation. "Where?"

"The Hokage gave his life sealing it in a newborn baby." I managed, barely able to get the words up. Telling Sasuke, then having him reject me as a human being would tear me into tiny pieces. I knew it was coming.

_He _knew it was coming. Comprehension flickered across his face with only a moment of wheel turning. His eyes widened in the slightest, and he drew away just barely. I didn't want to see the rest of the rejection. I pulled my face against my knees, which I was now clutching towards my chest. I shut my eyes and waited.

"You're…" He started, but he immediately stopped.

I cried. Liquid rolled off my cheeks and dripped into the fabric of my pant legs.

"Na-Naruto, don't…" His voice was half begging. He reached out and rubbed my shoulders.

"I only…found out before…I graduated." -Sob - "I didn't…M…know!" I sniffed and cried harder. There wasn't even any embarrassment, just dread. I was horrified that one of the precious people who didn't judge me, my friend - would reject me in disgust with what I was. "Wondering…Why every-everyone hated me so much…Everywhere I went…People abused me."

"What?" The sympathy had faded and turned into disbelief.

Shit.

I had just told him a secret that was almost as big as actually housing the Kyubbi. We were talking about _dreams_, and I said I was attacked and beaten in the _real_ world. "N-no - I meant- " I stumbled around stutters and shortness of breath from crying.

"Don't try to hide what you just told me!" He let go of my shoulders. "Why didn't you tell someone this was happening?!" I peered past my knees at him, and he was furious. He looked like the next breathing thing that wasn't me that came near him would get it's head ripped off.

His expression only smoothed a bit when he saw me. "Because…it would make me…sound weak." I whimpered, fisting the grass below me in my hands.

Sasuke flinched, and looked at me with a disgust that wasn't due to the monster. "That's the reason?" He drawled angrily. "That's it!? That's why you let people do those things?!" He might have stomped his foot, but that was _way_ to juvenile for Sasuke.

Why was he so mad? He suddenly acted like he'd be willing to rip my attackers throats out, yet he was probably aiming it at it me for not getting help. My crying had slowed, and while it was still small, I could keep my voice straight. "It doesn't matter anyway. Why should anyone care about me?" I whispered.

Sasuke didn't say anything for a while. His face loosened and his muscles un-tensed. Then finally he replied, "Kakashi, Iruka, and all of the other adults in the village know. But Kakashi, Iruka, The Third, and Sakura…They don't think you're a monster. None of your friends think you're a monster."

I wondered why he didn't say his own name. Maybe he _did _hate me. "They…" I was about to say, they didn't know. But Sakura was the only one who was unaware.

"Iruka and Kakashi, and all of those other kind people in your life know what's inside of you, but they take care of you. They love you." He was right, and he had just found out. He hadn't even comprehended exactly how powerful and how dangerous a weapon was inside of me, or how much I had been through, but that much he was right on about.

I wiped my eyes on y sleeves, flushing a little now since Sasuke had seen me cry like this. "What about you? Do you think I'm a monster!?" I snarled back.

"No. I never would. I'm not like them." Sasuke's face had almost completely gone back to it's normal, stoic, expressionless ways.

But I could sense his complete sincerity. The invisible weight lifted off my chest and I could breathe easier now. He was still my friend. He was special. He didn't judge me like the rest of the whole damned world.

"That's enough for today," He added, getting up slowly. "I'll see you here tomorrow for training."

I bit back whatever I may have answered with. I had millions of thank-yous and questions, but I was still in the aftermath of being upset, and Sasuke appeared to be done. I stood up.

"I'm sorry for making you upset." He added, almost quietly.

I nodded, head down. "Me too."

What I didn't know, was that Sasuke desperately didn't want me to go home. Home to those people. He was just too embarrassed to ask if he could come with me. Or if I could go somewhere else.


	5. What's wrong with me?

I woke up the next morning and I was sure I had broken ribs. Maybe they really were broken, but it could have been my minds exaggeration. They _hurt_.

The night before had been the worst of the entire month. There were three men. I had been threatened at first, but then the work with their fists began. Every ounce of me, during every attack, - just like Sasuke had questioned - wanted to fight back. But I didn't, for the blame could be turned around by the men, then I'd be imprisoned for it. Besides, I couldn't kill much less hurt anyone in the village, no matter what they did.

I tried desperately to get out of bed. Every attempt to lift my chest had resulted in small bursts of intense pain. Finally I bared it, getting out of bed and wincing at the ache. After I was up moving around, the pain had subsided to a dull throb.

I wasn't looking forward to training at all.

I was last and late to the grounds. Sakura, sitting in the grass looked worried. "Naruto, you look dead. Are you alright?"

Great. The dark circles and the cloudy aura didn't fade. "Ha, I'm fine! it's nothing!" I gave her a thumbs up, and I tried to make it look real, but it still felt halfhearted to me. "Just slept in late, that's all!"

Sasuke's eyes twitched and he shook his head so barely Sakura hadn't noticed. Now that he knew, he probably assumed it. Now that we were with Sakura, My starring had come back. Full force.

"Think you'll win today, Usuratonkachi?" He was gloating now, trying to pull me away from my attitude? Maybe?

"Yeah, I'm gonna beat your ass, Teme!" My ribs still hurt like hell, but I was adjusting to the mood Sasuke and Sakura set.

Sakura scoffed, "No way, Naruto! Sasuke always beats you!"

"Whatever!"

So the training and fighting went on just as it had the day before. But today, I was more distracted. Whenever Sasuke was defensive or when he stopped, I was staring at him, still going unnoticed. I hadn't been paying much attention, but one of the hits he got on me was an elbow in the ribs. I barely, _barely_ held in my yelp.

The same time as two days ago, Sakura called us off. "Sasuke won again!" She called, stopping me in mid-block.

"No! Argh…" Someday I would beat him.

"Good job, anyway." Sasuke muttered.

I came up with an experiment. It hit me like a bullet. I would try it tonight, if no one was waiting.

"I'll see you guys tomorrow!" Sakura headed off when Sasuke and I had ended combat and normalized out breathing again. Wow, no attempt at a date?

Before she was all the way gone -a precaution I thought he would have taken - Sasuke was on my case. I nearly jumped. "What happened?" He ordered, glaring into my eyes.

I turned my head just slightly to avoid his gaze. "What do you mean, what happened?"

His eyes narrowed further. "You looked like a wreck this morning, and your fighting had been the worst it's been in weeks. What did they _do_?" Man, he was good. I had come to our meetings looking down and tattered before, but now that he knew the true reason he wouldn't let it rest.

I gulped. "Nothing, I was just tired."

Sasuke sighed, anger turning into aspiration. He must have sensed my discomfort. "It's fine, just tell me."

I wrapped my arms around my torso. I knew he could work anything out of me anyway, so I gave in. "They…punched me in the ribs a few times."

By the way I was shivering, Sasuke could guess to what extent I meant by 'punching.' "Then why -" He pursed his lips together. " - Don't you stay with Iruka?"

I shut my eyes. "Because I don't want to put stress on him! They find out that's where I am, and he might get hurt!" I yelled. "It's none of your business so…" I started to walk away. "Just stay out of this!" But I loved it. I loved that he cared enough about me to worry about my safety, and I knew he wasn't really suggesting I hurt Iruka, just trying to help me.

He didn't answer so I kept on going, a bit regretfully.

No one was waiting for me tonight, at least not in the beginning. I hoped things would stay that way through the night.

Now, for my experiment.

I wanted to know just _how_ I stared at Sasuke. I knew I did it, but how might help me figure out why. I rummaged through my drawers for a hand mirror that probably didn't exist, but in my messy room, I wouldn't know until I turned it upside down, and did just that. Finally, I found one. Round with a handle.

I closed my eyes. Picture Sasuke. Snow white skin, midnight black hair, and onyx eyes that were sometimes crimson. All I needed was his face. Now imagine he's right in front of you, and you're staring at him. The way you always do.

When I first opened, there was just my concentrated face, looking back at me, then melting to frustration. "This is not a mirror. This is Sasuke." I reminded myself out loud.

I concentrated, opened again, and saw my expression for a split-second before I was shocked. I looked…like I was in ecstasy. My eyes were half-lidded and I was…Blushing? What the _hell_?

I put the mirror down slowly and shook my head back and forth. Clear the image, clear the image, clear the image…Knocking filled my apartment.

Iruka! I was at the door almost instantly. What a perfect routine. Once or twice a week, there was ramen and one on one time with my favorite teacher. "I almost decided to come tomorrow, I see you're glad I didn't!" I pulled on my jacket and came out, so ready for more ramen.

"Anything new or exiting?" Iruka asked at the bottom of the steps.

"Mm…Not really!" I replied, bubbly.

"With Sasuke?"

Damn, for once I had hoped to avoid that. Iruka's presence had cleared my head, and now Sasuke was overtaking again. Why him? Why now? The mirror came back to me. "Ah…He's…Being friendly. He's not treating me like crap."

We got to Ichiraku and the conversation continued there, in-between slurps and swallows.

"Why the sudden change?" He asked.

Iruka did not, could not, _would_ not know about the violence at night, but he was already completely aware of the Kyubbi.

"I told Sasuke."

"Told him what?" But I had a feeling he already knew.

"About…Kyubbi."

Iruka answered a moment too late for comfort. "Oh. What was his reaction?"

I almost smiled. "He didn't care about what was inside my body, he just thought I was Naruto, either way."

"Do you know why you watch him?" Iruka asked.

"Um…Lots of reasons. But I don't know the overall reason, no." I shifted in my seat. "But…I saw the way I stare in a mirror. It's so…weird." Weird didn't exactly cover it for me, but Iruka could understand that word better than he could my jabbering about it.

"Naruto…?" I was zoning out and Iruka had noticed.

"Urgh," I sputtered. "It's bugging me all the time! What is this?" My chest was sore again, but I wasn't afraid like I had been when I was telling Sasuke about the monster, and it wasn't my ribs. Kyubbi had nearly fixed those up.

"W-hat?"

"What is this, this, thing, feeling, problem…whatever, what is it?" I managed.

Iruka sighed, a strange response to my attitude. He laid money on the table for the four bowls - two each - we had eaten, and got up to leave. I followed reluctantly. "There are a lot of things you could be going through right now, but I don't want to say one thing and have it be another." I didn't answer, so he walked me all the way home, all the way to the bottom of the steps. "Kakashi should be back in two days." He added. "Then you'll probably have another mission."

I nodded, unable to say anything but the usual, "Thanks for the ramen." I waved sort of, looked around my messy apartment for any intruders, then headed towards my room. Still, no one had came. Out of force of habit I had to run back to my front door and lock it before going to sleep.

My chest still hurt, mostly higher up. My heart throbbed when I remembered the mirror again. I curled up into my sheets with normal clothes I didn't bother to change out of. I practically prayed that when Kakashi got back, and I got my mind into a mission, or some hard training, I would be able to shake my attitude and be myself again.

_Kit, what's wrong with you? I can't sleep._

_Shut-up Kyubbi, I don't know._

_It's about the Uchiha boy, isn't it?_

_You're making it worse, Kyubbi! _But I knew this had something to do with said boy.

_So it is. Relax and forget about him for the night. I'd like to sleep, and your body's mood is not helping._

_Whatever._

I really did want to sleep, but much to Kyubbi's annoyance, I didn't get Sasuke - nor that mirror- out of my brain. I fell asleep to his face and - it sounded soothing in my imagination - voice.

What is wrong with me?

Why is Sasuke the only thing on my mind?


	6. Fighting

Two days later - ones of training with completely violent free nights - and Kakashi was back. He randomly appeared - and he was known for that, and randomly disappearing - when Sasuke and I were nearing the end of a match. Sasuke seemed to have forgotten, or at least let go of the last time we talked. He no longer questioned me, but maybe that was because I was perky again. "You two are doing great." He had praised, without making anyone aware of his presence beforehand. I turned my head, Sasuke paused and looked too.

"Kakashi-Sensei!" Sakura crawled up from her place on the grass. "Glad you're back!"

"Good to be back," He replied, visible eye closing in a smile. "I see you boys have gotten your training in while I've been gone."

Sasuke and I both nodded. I still gazed at him, and still felt sore when I went to bed every night. I could never get the damn bastard out of my _head_. It was impossible. However, Sasuke's attitude didn't make any more changes.

"So?" Sakura inquired, "Do you have a new mission for us?"

"Maybe, I'll know by tomorrow. How have things been?" He asked.

"Pretty good…" Sakura replied. Kakashi was quick to stray away from her, but I couldn't blame him and neither could she. Any of us, no matter who he chose, would say the same thing. Good. The norm.

"Naruto, why are you being so quiet?" I hadn't spoken yet?! Woops. "I can understand Sasuke, but I've never seen you this way." He smiled slightly, but I couldn't.

"Sorry, sorry, just thinking a lot, Sensei!" About _Sasuke_, I concluded..

He gave me a weird look, probably wondering what - or why - I was thinking. "Well, since I'm back, I order you all to take the rest of the day off. Tomorrow we may have a big mission, so rest up. I won't tolerate you if your exhausted."

We all head bobbed wordlessly, and for once in his life, Kakashi didn't make a hand sign and teleport away from us. He just walked casually away, and all of our eyes watched him until he was out of sight, like he had just killed someone.

"Wow, it's only around noon…Hey Sasuke?" Sakura simpered at the end. Kakashi's behavior had completely left her.

"Hn." Hn - Or Tch, or Che - In Sasuke's language was either, yes, what, or just a sound he made because he was annoyed, or expressing some other feeling.

She tapped her fingertips together nervously. "Would you…like to go do something? With me?" At least she hadn't stopped asking completely. Then it would have thought it was the apocalypse because all three of us had fallen apart.

"I'm busy." Sasuke looked like he was racking his brain to sound polite, but someday I seriously thought Sasuke would drop a bomb on her.

"Doing what?" Sakura asked quietly, fearing that she was intruding.

I was surprised, she had never asked that before, but she must have been getting suspicious. Suspicious of what? Sasuke not liking her at all? Oh _there's _a shock. Would Sasuke have an answer?

He was a little taken aback too. Even Sasuke could come up with a comeback. (He wasn't busy…) "None of your business. If I wanted you to know, I'd tell you." Politeness? Gone.

"Oh." She pulled herself lazily to her feet. "Then I'll see you guys here tomorrow." She mumbled, trying to hide her usual - yet use to - heartbreak.

"See ya!" I attempted to cheer her as she walked away. I didn't get an answer, but I knew somehow it had helped. I would never, ever suggest that she continue driving Sasuke up walls, but it was still sad to see her get rejected.

"Did anything happen last night?" He had asked. I blinked a few times, and wondered why he had started asking me all of a sudden. I was sure I hadn't looked tired, and I was as jovial as usual. I shook my head no, finally, and he looked relieved. "That's good."

I was starring, but he wasn't making eye contact anymore. "Naruto, I hate worrying about you."

"Then don't!" I adored it, though. I just couldn't let him know that. "I can take care of myself!"

"But it's sick, and wrong, and you're my friend!" He glared now, so I looked down. "I want to fix the problem!"

I narrowed my eyes, looking back up. "How!? Take the monster out and kill me?!"

"It would kill you?"

"Iruka told me something like that a long time ago, but I was little."

"Does it talk to you?" He mumbled, now looking a little quizzically at me. It wasn't exactly mean, just a curious look, probably wondering what it was like to share your body with a beast.

"Yeah, he's rude though. He's the reason all my wounds get healed so fast. He gives me his chakra." I answered. "He's like a literal conscience."

"He?" Sasuke smirked, and the face was so nostalgic it felt like he was back to normal.

_Right, Kyubbi?_

_What a dumb way to put it, Kit._

"Does he ever threaten you? He's sealed there, but does he ever tell you he wants to escape and destroy Konoha?" Sasuke talking and asking questions - much less to\ me - was still a little scary.

"I'll ask him."

_You heard him Kyubbi, want to escape?_

_Any day, kit. But I wouldn't destroy your village. Like I'd ever be freed before you die…_

"Er, He says he wouldn't destroy the village, but he doesn't believe he's ever getting out, so he's fine where he is." I answered, our mental conversation only taking a jiffy.

Sasuke nodded quickly, then completely changed the focus. "What are you going to do with your day off?" Was he avoiding something? He had just suddenly dropped his anger like it was nothing. But I decided not to probe him further.

"I dunno. Train? Eat ramen? I don't do anything much other then that when I'm not here."

Sasuke shifted his feet. "Me neither. I'm here, Sleeping, or training. Or eating, I suppose. doing necessaries."

It was so sick to me, that Sasuke wanted to kill his own brother, and that was coming from someone who had never had family. Sasuke wanted to kill his? The last living relative he had, to be exact. I know he has a good reason, but I still find it sick. He was just like me, training and getting more skilled his only ambition. Of course, I didn't want to kill anyone. At least, not unless I had to. I would for justice purpose. He got more skilled to murder.

"Then you don't want to do anything?" He asked, slightly at random. Not that he had the same issue that I had in this situation, but I almost asked, 'can you give me lessons on being so chill?' He'd find that laughable.

"I just don't wanna go home."

"Why?" There was a sharp edge to his voice. Of course he knew it was because I was afraid of who I'd find waiting for me, and that was always a small part of the reason.

"Not that!" I growled. "Okay, maybe a little-" I had added this because a hostile look spread across his face. "But I just don't want to sit at home all day!"

"So stay here. I'm not going anywhere." He turned on his heels and loped towards his favored tree to sit. Sitting, relaxing, and zoning seemed to content him. "I was planning on hanging out here, anyway." I breathed in relief mentally. He fell into sitting, spine against his tree. This time, though, I decided to sit directly beside him, but not on the trunk.

No one else sat there, so I had deemed the tree his. The tree was usually blossoming pink, but it was fall now, and all of the blossoms had fell, and most of them had been swept away. Neither of us really like the color pink, but the trees were still pretty to anyone's eyes.

"Teme, shouldn't we do something other then _sit_ here?" I asked finally, but I was still starring across the training grounds. Most of it was a flat, dusty plane, but some of it, like where we sat, was grassy. Three lone poles stood across from us, beyond them a creek. Target's adorned other trees, and the rock Sakura would occasional lean against watching our battles was to the right. The K.I.A gravestone was to our left. The main districts within the village were over the bridge behind us. The bridge also went over the creek, for it curved all the way around, from where we saw it in front of us to behind us in a loop somewhere off to the left.

His shoulders moved up so barely, you could have mistaken it for a twitch, not a voluntary shrug.

I fidgeted some, then I brought up what he had said earlier. "You said-"

He had been closing his eyes, and now they opened. He leaned up more and turned his head. I stopped breathing for just a short moment, not enough for him to notice I had held it. Simple little movements, and he looked the most alluring.

"Earlier you said, you wanted to-" I started, knowing in the beginning I wouldn't be able to finish it, partially because of the problem at hand, and because I was a little too transfixed on his features. "Fix -"

He cut me off anyway. "I don't like you going home having to worry about people abusing you. I want to help. I can't just sit and let it happen, it's horrid."

I wanted to thank him, but my usual Naruto self wouldn't let me, and shined through now. "Well there's nothing you can do, anyway! This has been happening ever since I was a little kid, and just because you found about it, doesn't mean you can fix it! I don't care anyways, I'm use to it." I added, my last statement sounded less assuring. Unless you're going through what I am, you can't comprehend what it's like. It's impossible to get use to the fact that people wanted you dead.

Sasuke shifted back into his lounging position. "Sorry. I guess it just isn't normal to walk up to someone and ask, 'when you go home, do people beat you up because you harbor a nine tailed fox demon?' I didn't mean to intrude."

The Naruto on the outside had to match comebacks with Sasuke. On the outside, I argued with him, and tried to act better then him. He had always acted on impulse, and responded the same. He won, ninety percent of the time.

But right now, on the inside, I was sad to hear him say that. Because he wasn't arguing with me, or getting pointlessly annoyed with me. He was distressed that I didn't want his support. At least, that's what he showed on the outside, and Sasuke was not one to show his exterior emotion without really meaning it.

"Sasuke," I murmured, almost immediately feeling guilty. "I didn't mean it like that. It's just makes you feel weak to need the help of others for stupid reasons."

This offended him. "_Stupid_?" His voice was sharp like before. He completely lifted himself from sitting against the tree so he was closer, leaning on his hands, and facing me. "It's really _stupid_ when respectable ninja come to torture you in the middle of the night, just because of what you carry against your will? When they come with threatening voices, their fists, knives, and maybe more that we don't know about?"

I drew back. He was infuriated. Sasuke, after this many days of study, obviously had emotions and was obviously capable of letting them out. More so than letting them out, he lost control of them. "Why don't you kill them?" He asked suddenly, like the solution was obvious. I had the power to. "Why do you let sick human beings like them continue to live?"

"Because," I growled, my voice got loud and strained quickly. "Because If I kill them, or even fight back, then what do you think happens!?" I screamed. "They tell ANBU. ANBU thinks I'm to unstable and destructive, I get put behind bars, and treated like I'm some experiment!" My voice cracked at the end. "To those people, I'm a monster! If that's how they choose to deal with their problems, let them!"

Now we both drew away, but not because of each other.

"That's quite enough, boys."


	7. Sasuke Too

Until he showed up, I hadn't realized how loud we were being. Or how up in each others face we were. In the end, before we pulled apart, we had been inches away. "Kakashi-Sensei-" I started to make an excuse, but he cut me off.

"Enough. I've heard the entire conversation already." That's why he had walked away. So he could hide his aura from bushes, or at least out of sight, and spy on us. He heard the _entire_ conversation. "You boys were getting loud. I didn't want to see things get out of hand…over something like this." I dipped my head so I was looking at my exposed toes.

"Kakashi, nothing -" Sasuke started, eyes trailing slowly to me, then back at him.

"Sasuke, why don't you stay here? I want to talk to you about something. Naruto, go enjoy the rest of your day off." But it was an order. He wanted us away from each other, and I didn't have an option.

I slowly got to my feet and walked away. "Whatever, Sensei." What the hell was I supposed to do now? I regretted the entire conversation now that I had to go. Home. Train. Joy.

"So, I _claimed_ I was here for the entire conversation, but…" Kakashi stuttered, and he would have grinned had he not been so serious. Sasuke already knew the base reasons why he had called him out. Still sitting in his previous spot, he rolled his eyes. Typical of his sensei.

"What started this?"

Sasuke began almost dully, like he was trying to hide is real emotions. "Ever since you've been gone, I've been checking on him to make sure he's alright. We've been talking a lot more. He told me about the nine tailed fox demon being inside him…and such."

"And Such?" Kakashi repeated, unsuprised. "To check to see if he's aright because?"

"It's his business, and I am in no justice to tell you." Sasuke snapped, turning his head away in a bit of a childish manner.

"Very well," Kakashi sat down in front of Sasuke, which caused the Uchiha to turn his gaze further, as if he was shying away. "Now, the other matter."

"I don't want to talk about it." Sasuke kept his head turned, his voice was dead.

"And I really don't care." Kakashi answered simply, but his voice had softened to that of a voice a father would use on his son. "How do you feel?"

Sasuke flinched and gave in. "You already know. Not like it's changed." He turned his head back. Kakashi smiled behind his mask, visible eye shut. The slightest, slightest red dusted Sasuke's face, but anyone in Konoha would have paid to see it, nonetheless.

"Tell him the truth." Kakashi chided gently.

"Do you really think anything is that easy?" Sasuke hissed, eyes narrowing.

"No. But in the end, you always regret it," He answered. "You know Sasuke, it wouldn't kill you to be nicer to him." More serious this time. "He could catch on himself, but he won't fall in love with someone who's so unloving to him."

"I am being nicer to him," He answered, emphasis on am. "I just…suddenly changing my attitude towards him would make him think I was a freak, and it's so unnatural for me to act different." He trailed off, then quickly stopped with a new statement. Kakashi had caught him, using the 'L' word and 'falling' and 'Naruto' in the same sentence. "Besides, Kakashi. He'd never fall in love with me. And If I told him the truth…He'd laugh at me. He'd hate me, he'd never speak to me again."

Kakashi stood back up, sighing more. "You never know, Sasuke. You may be surprised."

Sasuke stood up as well, already beginning to walk away. He didn't give Kakashi more of an answer. As much as he hated to admit it, he felt comfortable around Kakashi, like he really was a father he could tell anything to.

"You really are something else on the inside, Sasuke." Kakashi said, in his same soft tone as before.

I trained for the rest of the day, hitting targets and seeing how many books I could hold on my head for balance. Those kept on falling off. I certainly wasn't balanced after the previous. I was long overdue for some violence or threatening. I had fixed myself instant ramen, eaten it, gotten my night clothes on, and still nothing happened. I was free for another night.

_Hey, Kyubbi._

_Why do you disturb my sleep, kit?_

_Get over it. I'm going to sleep soon, anyway._

_Is this about the Uchiha boy?_

_NO! _But it was, and he knew it already.

_Kyubbi…I don't think anyone knows my emotions better then you do. What am I feeling?_

_For the Uchiha?_

_His _name_ is Sasuke._

_I don't care what his name is._

_So, what do you think?_

_I have evidence from your body and mind that you're always thinking about him. While human emotions have never been my specialty…_

_Get on with it._

_Fine, Brat. You're hopelessly, somewhat, in love with him. I think that's what humans call -_

_KYUBBI!  
_

_YOU ASKED, KIT._

I grumbled, ending our mental conversation. It was around nine at night, and I was ready for sleep, as I had told Kyubbi. I crawled into my sheets, throwing on an extra blanket. I am not in love with Sasuke. I don't care what Kyubbi, or anyone else for that matter, thinks. I can't be in love with Sasuke. That can't possibly be it, could it?

"Morning, Naruto!" Sakura greeted when I hit the bridge, right before our training spot. We usually waited here when we expected a mission. The bridge was made of stones and crossed over the creek like I had observed so many times before. This spot's tree's above were maple, and dropping leaves to the surface of the water.

I grinned at her. "Morning, Sakura. Good morning, Sasuke." I added at the end, watching expectantly.

He acknowledged me with a nod and a mumbled, "Morning," I leaned on my elbows against the bridge. Commence waiting for Kakashi. But this was usual, nothing new. We waited a good hour for Kakashi, Sakura making some small talk with Sasuke and I, then finally, Kakashi showed up.

"YOU'RE _LATE_, KAKASHI-SENSEI!" Sakura and I screeched in unison. Sasuke just glared in the same annoyance. It would be fun one day for him to just give up the cool exterior and yell with us.

"Ah. So sorry, I-" He started, shaking one hand.

"We don't want to hear it!" I replied curtly. He had a random generic excuse everyday for why he was late. An old lady needing help across a street, or getting her purse stolen. Children calling upon him to get cats out of trees. We all knew they were fakes. Maybe we'd believe him if he was five or ten minutes late, but none of these things took an hour or more.

He shook his head, then began. "About the mission…"

We all three suddenly became more focused. The word mission was like you were automatically telling us we could be concerning life or death, pass or fail, punishment or no punishment. Missions were everything, and no matter what price was to be paid, they were completed, unless a Jounin called us off, or the circumstances for quitting were a special order. "It's unfortunately arranged for tomorrow, but we're heading out today. We'll be there early, and maybe we can relax beforehand."

Yes! _Real_ mission! We're going somewhere! Something to get my mind off of - damn it, I thought about him. "So, what's the mission, Kakashi?" Sakura questioned.

"It's an A-rank I need backup for. I'll need you three to do some hiding, spying, and guarding for me. Nothing too serious. Simple things…" It sounded like he wasn't really supposed to be taking us on an A - rank, but since we weren't really participating, it must have been okay.

Oh yes, it was awesome to top it off. "Seriously!? Woo-Hoo!" I felt the need to dance around because I didn't have dishes, or babysitting, or finding cats…But I restrained. Sasuke smirked, and Sakura smiled weakly. She wasn't looking forward to this, I knew. She never did. Firstly, she always felt like she got in the way, and felt too frail to assist in missions without dragging us down. Secondly, she hated the fact that she had to stand behind, and watch Sasuke and I work and be hurt.

"Anyway," Kakashi broke in. "We can head out today, I'll give you an hour to pack anything you may need. Pack light, your carrying it around."

When an hour had passed, we were all three by the gate to leave the village. Kakashi wasn't late that time, he was there before all three of us. "All packed, I see?" Kakashi stated more than asked. We all nodded. I had a sleeping pad rolled tight enough to fit in my one bag, Kunai, Shuriken, ration bars, and bandages.

"What do you have to do?" Sasuke asked sullenly.

"It's an Assassination mission." He answered, trying to keep his voice low, but failed. He was avoiding Sakura and I.

"Who do you have to kill, Sensei?" Sakura asked innocently.

"No one you've heard of." He assured, patting her hair. "A Sound ninja who's been killing off ANBU and some other Leaf Ninja. They just want him dead, that's all. Nothing too extreme." Nothing too extreme always lead to serious danger for us.

"So…Why can't we just do it now?" I asked. "Why do we have to wait another day?"

"The Sound ninja threatened, well…More like played Konoha. Their daring us to come kill him, like it's a game. He asked tomorrow."

I pouted. "Kakashi, you're supposed to surprise your enemies!"

He shook his head. "That's what the Sound ninja wants you to think. Now," His voice lightened on the last word. "I figured we could head in the direction of the sound, and maybe get some relaxation in before the mission officially starts."

Sakura sighed. "Some spot in the forest, you mean, Where we stop to set up camp? It sounds great…"

"I know a good spot on the way to the Sound. There's water, and the sunset can be seen perfectly." Kakashi chimed.

"Then let's go already! We have to hurry if we want to be to Sound tomorrow!" I interrupted.

"Alright enough," Kakashi growled. "Everyone ready?"

We all nodded, and the journey towards sound began. I got to be myself again. With a mission to take my mind away from my emotions, maybe I would forget the entire Sasuke problem.

Yeah, Right. Like that would work out for me.


	8. Sunset

"Hey Sensei, where's this spot?" Sakura asked, breaking the silence of a few minutes. Other than Sasuke, we were never quiet, much to Kakashi's slight dissmay. We had walked or ran all day, clearing a huge distance between the Leaf and Sound villages. Dusk had just begun.

"We're almost there, actually. There's a clearing to the right after the next…quarter of a mile, or so." Kakashi answered, head lost in his book as he walked. He never worried about hitting things with is face down all the time, his senses were so acute.

My brain sparked an opportunity. "Race you!" I exclaimed suddenly, only taking one glance at Sasuke before bolting forward.

He was quick to match my pace, even though I had a head start. I could hear Kakashi sigh and Sakura cheer and whoop behind us. He caught up to me, now we were side by side. We fought for the lead, taking turns getting in front of each-other.

I gasped suddenly, my foot had caught on something, and I was falling. The view infornt of me was unrevealed slowly from top to bottom, and then my view was of the ground. I had tried to catch myself, but instead ended up falling forward and landing on my stomach. "Ow!"

I didn't have enough time to react, so I didn't get up. I stayed that way in amazement, head tipped up to watch Sasuke run past and win, but was instead met with an impossible sight. Sasuke slowed, losing momentum. He skidded to a stop, then turned around. "Sorry, dobe."

I crawled off my stomach and to my hands and knees, then stared in awe. "What do you mean, 'sorry'?" I thought that word didn't exist in his competitive race vocabulary.

"I think I tripped you," He mumbled. "Didn't mean to." He came closer and offered his hand. "Here." I looked at his hand for a half a second too long. Why wouldn't he take advantage of the situation and win, accident or not? It wasn't even comforting he had tried to help me. It was just creepy.

"Like it down there?" He asked, shaking me from my thoughts.

"Uh, No." I squeezed his hand, and he helped pull me to my feet. His hand was hot and sticky, and almost curved my fingers around his…but I didn't go quickly enough. He let go, and I found myself disappointed.

"Hey, why'd you stop?" Sakura called, catching up to us along with Kakashi.

"The dobe tripped." Sasuke mocked, as if he hadn't helped me up.

"Over _your_ foot!" I growled back. Then I noticed something. He wasn't an ass when we we're alone. When Sakura and Kakashi are around, he was. Was he trying to show me, and only me? Is he hiding from _them_ that he can be something other then a bastard?

Okay, more importantly Sakura?

"Well anyway," Kakashi interrupted before our argument got any worse, and he did well in snapping us out of it. "The clearing is to the right here, hear the water running?"

"I do!" Sakura chirped.

She was happy, so now she was the one running. I almost called Sasuke out again, but thought better of it. Three males including me huffed and followed slowly behind her. "What do you guys think? Will this work for camping?" Kakashi asked. The trees parted to a creek-side clearing, encircled by coniferous trees like we had traveled through all day. It was large enough for us all to have room to sleep comfortably. The dirt clearing morphed into rocks, some of which were big enough to stand on where the creek started. The creek was four or five feet across. There was a break in the trees across the water that gave a perfect view of the setting sun, just like he had said.

"It's great, Sensei!" Sakura answered.

"Awesome!" I replied.

"Good," Sasuke mumbled. He was very pleased though, I could tell. Somewhere for him to zone.

Kakashi reached into one of his larger pockets, and pulled out an orange cover novel, not the same one he had been reading on the way. "Enjoy the sunset then get some sleep." He said, head already in his book. He lowered himself to sitting against a rock, trying not to take his eyes off the pages.

I immediately went for my sandals, pulling them off. I left them strewn on the ground, and walked towards the water. I sat down on one of the larger rocks, dipping my feet in the water. "Cold!" I jerked them out and slowly put them back in.

"No, really Naruto?" Sakura said sarcastically, but she followed suit. She left her sandals in a more orderly fashion next to one of the rocks, then sat down about six feet away from me on another one. She put her feet in, shivering, but kept them there.

"Hn." Sasuke didn't take his sandals off, just came down to sit in the gap between Sakura and I. (Much to her enjoyment.) He crossed his legs on a groups of smaller stones that worked like a perch, obviously not wanting wet feet. He seemed a little dazed to me.

"Look at the colors…" Sakura mumbled. She was looking up at the setting sun. A million shades of amber, gold, fuchsia, crimson, amethyst, and a slight azure blended perfectly in the sky.

"I know, the sunset's gorgeous." I exclaimed.

"What do you think, Sasuke?" Sakura asked, for once not eyeing him. She was too enthralled in the sky.

"Pretty," He practically breathed the words. It exited Sakura because normally he'd turn his head and make up some kind of 'nothing special' retort.

"It really is lovely," Kakashi surprised all of us. He stopped looking at his book to view the sunset.

Moments when our team could stop bickering and fighting, and enjoy the simple things in life that made it worth living, were the best. When Sakura could stop crushing on Sasuke, when Sasuke could stop being an ass, and I'll even admit it, when I'm not annoying. They were my favorite moments. Too bad they were short lived. Sakura had gotten caught up in the sunset. I knew to her, it was all too romantic to not try at Sasuke's emotions. Sasuke was not one to get taken away by the moment. She was bolder than usual.

Silently, Sakura slowly scooted herself closer to Sasuke. His eyes were shut and he didn't notice. Hesitantly, she slid one hand closer to his, which was on the ground. Then she quickly - before he could react, slipped her hand below his. His eyes snapped open, and he slapped at her hand. She drew back, and Sasuke gave her a 'What the hell do you think you're doing?' Glare.

"Sorry," She muttered.

"What is it going to take, Sakura?" He asked suddenly. I thought maybe he had finally snapped.

"What?" She asked, already knowing what he was talking about anyway.

"How much do I have to reject you?" He deadpanned.

She didn't answer. Sasuke rolled his eyes, turning his head away because she had began stroking her hand like it was treasure, Now that Sasuke had touched it. She could probably amputate it and sell it for money in Konoha. I fidgeted, trying to get my own hands to stop moving. I was not jealous. Was not. Stop. Sasuke drifted back into his dazed state. Other than for Sakura's interruption, he seemed relaxed and content in this situation. It slowly began to get darker and darker.

When it was considerably dark, I had found myself nearly asleep where I sat. I had pulled my feet out and dried them off earlier. However, my eyes shot open, and I was completely awake when I felt it. It was only for a millisecond, but it was so absolute that I knew it had really happened. I felt Sasuke brush his hand over the top of mine.

It had to be an accident.

I had thought Kakashi fell asleep, but Sasuke's hand pulled back quickly at his voice. "Get some sleep, everyone, it's late."

"Yes Kakashi," We all answered automatically, and simultaneously, me more dreary then everyone else. We all rolled out sleeping mats on the dirt, and Kakashi slept leaned against his rock in a sitting position. Sakura curled up instantly, her mat father away from all us boys. Sasuke and I were parallel to each other and spread apart on the bank.

"'Night everybody!" Sakura called.

"Goodnight." The rest of us called in unison.

I felt like Sakura. I knew it was pathetic, but I rubbed my hand as I fell asleep. It hadn't been this way when he helped me up, because he was just trying to help me. Now…No, it was an accident. It damn well better have been an accident.


	9. Starring

"No. Please."

I blinked, roused from my sleep. I held in a yawn and fully opened my eyes. It was pitch black, and I had to lie still and wait for my eyes to adjust. Normally I slept in late. This was certainly to early to be awake.

"Stop it…Don't."

I sat up and peered around. Sakura and Kakashi were sound asleep. I flopped back to my other side. It was Sasuke. He was unharmed, but the hand visible to me was clutching tight to the mat. His body tossed, and he was the one doing the mumbling. It was quiet enough for only me to hear. "Sa-" I bit my tongue, remembering Kakashi and Sakura were asleep. I crawled quietly to the other side of him. He was asleep, mostly, but his face was distorted in pain, maybe fear. He couldn't wake up, but his closed eyelids twitched like he was trying.

"Mom, Dad, Get away."

I crawled closer to him, and was tempted to wake him just so he wouldn't have to deal with the dream. More like nightmare. Just like he had told me, most of his nightmares were about his clan's murder. He must have been seeing his parents…being killed. He was quiet for awhile, and I thought maybe it was over. Then he continued mumbling. "Itachi…"

"Sasuke," I called softly, getting closer so he might hear it, but Sakura and Kakashi wouldn't.

He Shot upright, face to face with me. Inches away from my face, to be more exact. Both of our eyes were as wide as saucers. We stayed like that for awhile, for he was probably trying to focus that it was my face, not some random person waking him in the middle of the night.

He breathed out, and layed down again. "What were you doing?" He whispered, Sakura and Kakashi were too deep in sleep to hear anything.

Shoot, was he suspicious since I had been leaning over him while he was sleeping? "You were talking in your sleep. I wanted to see if you were okay." We were both whispering.

"I'm fine." He turned his head away. "You know…just dreaming." Hardly, I thought. "Sorry I woke you up."

"I woke up on my own," I said quickly, lying. I didn't want him to feel guilty over something that trivial. "I just heard you, so -"

"Naruto…" He interrupted, slowly, not exactly questioning though, just saying my name out loud.

"Yeah?"

I bit my lip to hold in whatever sound may have followed. Sakura and Kakashi would have woken up, had I let it out. Then it hit me that Kakashi was probably awake, for he could hear whispers. I didn't really care what he saw.

Sasuke moved his hand so it rested on top of mine, for exactly a second that I could count. Then he drew back, his fingers sliding across the top of my hand. He mumbled, "Go back to sleep."

I swallowed. "O-kay." Craaap, don't let your voice go. I tilted my head towards Sakura, but she hadn't stirred.

I fumbled to get back to my mat, then curled up and waited. After a while, Sasuke's breathing was even, and he had fallen peacefully back asleep. I hoped neither of us had to deal with a nightmare tonight, him not another. That wasn't an accident. So, why did he do it? Why did I have that reaction?

_Kyubbi._

_What?_

_There's something wrong with me._

_I've already told you the answer, kit._

_That can't possibly be right! _

_You've got something better?  
_

I curled up, trying to warm my body more.

_No. Never mind._

_Maybe there isn't anything wrong with you, you just can't accept it._

_Shut up, that isn't it!_

I fell back asleep, since Kyubbi hadn't answered me. Sasuke was still the only thing in my mind, and involuntarily, _he _filled me dreams, not horrific nightmares. I _can't_ be in love with Sasuke. I just can't be. I won't let myself believe it, or go through with it, even if it is true, which it isn't!

I groaned and turned my head when the blinding sunlight came through the canopy. Then I changed my mind, thinking everyone would be mad if I slept in. I sat up, yawning and stretching my arms behind me. I looked across, and saw Sakura's bed empty. I looked beside me one way, and saw Kakashi was absent as well. I turned the other way, and finally saw someone, Sasuke. He was sitting upright, watching me for signs of waking.

"So you were planning to wake up." He mumbled.

"Uhn, maybe." I rubbed my eyes.

"Kakashi went to go…do something. Sakura is down the creek a ways. Said she was filling a canteen or something…" Sasuke answered, before I could ask where the others were. It was like he had read my mind. "When Kakashi gets back, the mission begins for real." He added.

I fell backwards on my mat, but I was completely awake now. "What do you think he wants us to do?"

"Keep watch, or something like that."

I hated to keep concluding that I stared at him whenever I got the chance. But I still did anyway, and I was now. It was whenever he wasn't watching, so he never knew. Now, I almost turned. I almost turned away, but then I wouldn't have been able to see his face. He turned to look at me, and he could see the face that I had seen in the mirror. I sat back up slowly. His eyes seemed to be frozen on me, now neither of us could stop looking. He didn't glare at me or give me dirty looks. He returned the staring with almost…curiosity. Maybe even a fraction of that admiration I had.

Neither of us could pull our eyes away.

"Boys?" A suspicious inquire sounded. Both of us practically jumped and jerked our heads in unison to see Kakashi. He glanced at Sasuke, then me, then back to Sasuke, and asked, "Do one of you have something on your face?"

"No," we said at the same time. Then we looked at eachtoher in frustration. We were doing everything simultaneously.

"Hey, Naruto! About time you got up!" Sakura came back with a canteen, water dripping off the sides.

"Anyway, time to head out again." Kakashi said, shaking his head. "Here."

Kakashi tossed us all headsets. I almost dropped mine, grasping wildly for it in my arms that had barely caught it in the first place. "What's this for?" I asked. I still had the shock imprinted on my mind. Sasuke saw me starring at him, like that.

"When we get near a certain point, I'll go ahead, and you three will stay put. I'll head into Sound, and go to the meeting place. Your job is to stay behind and make sure he isn't sneaking out. That's what the headsets are for. You can tell me if you see him."

We all nodded.

"Now, pack up. Quickly, then we'll leave." He ordered.

"Right!" I answered, starting to roll up my mat. Sasuke and Sakura followed. When I was finished, I tied the ends and shoved it into my bag. Sasuke and Sakura did the same.

"You all have to be careful," Kakashi said, causing us to look up from our packing work. "I don't know how dangerous he is, so it's important he does not find out you're with me. You have to stay out of sight and out of hearing."

We nodded again, and Sakura shivered. I was tempted to tell her something like it was okay, or we'd do fine, but decided against it. "Let's just go already!" I pulled my bag over my shoulders, and without anymore words, we took off running back through the trees, Kakashi leading us.

I wish I knew what Sasuke was thinking.


	10. Behind

We ran until late afternoon, with only one break of five minutes. It was just beginning to get dark, the sun slowly fading away. As we got closer to Sound, animal and plant life changed. Things got more swamp like. The ground was no longer solid, more muddy, and there weren't any bending tree branches for us to jump across, so we were forced to tromp through the mud,

At about four, Kakashi told us to stop by ceasing his sprint. "Test those headsets, you stop here."

I gulped, then reached behind my ear and clicked it on. Everyone else was doing the same. "Testing!" I called.

"I can hear you." Sakura answered.

"I hear both of you." Kakashi said.

"Hn."

"I hear Sasuke!" Sakura chirped.

"I do too." Kakashi answered, grinning.

"Me too…"

"Alright. Listen up," Kakashi began. "Stay hidden. Say so in your headsets if you see anyone suspicious out here. For now, turn them off. I'm going to where he actually said he would be. This shouldn't take long at all, if all goes right." Yeah, if all goes right. Which it never does. I sware we attracted danger like magnets. We all reached up to turn them off. "Be careful." Kakashi reminded us, then took off running, deeper into the swampy like forest. A few seconds passed, and he disappeared from sight.

"Alright," Sasuke spoke up, causing Sakura and I to jump and look. "We need to stay hidden, but in a way where we can still see. Sakura, see this big tree?" He motioned towards a tree near us.

"Yeah!" She nodded.

"Climb up it. That way you'll be hidden, and you can see most of the landscape."

"Right!" She dashed towards the tree, only taking a second to focus chakra into her feet. She walked up the tree without using her hands, vertical to it. She was better then both of us at that.

"We'll patrol the ground." Sasuke called up to her. "Turn on your headset and tell us if you see anything move. Tell us the direction and speed and such."

"I will, Sasuke!" She sat on a branch and waved.

"Tch." He rolled his eyes.

"So, I'll go that way," I pointed in the east direction. "And you'll go that way." Then I pointed West.

He nodded. "Sure. Cover your area and look for anything suspicious. Let's go in a circle. Come back to this spot, and we'll meet up."

"Yeah," Up until lately, I always usually argued with him on these kinds of things. At least Sakura wasn't catching on.

"Be careful you two." Sakura called quietly from the tree.

"We will!" I assured her.

***

I sware, when anything, and I mean _anything_ moved, I freaked out. Even if it was just a bird. I would tense up and look around. The scenery wasn't helping. It was dusky, and the trees blocked out a majority of the light, making everything dim. The ground was muddy and wet in places, making me jump whenever I stepped and heard squishing noises.

It had been about half an hour down my direction, so I figured it was time to head back. I never saw anything suspicious, just some birds retiring to trees for the night, and a lizard. I stopped, turned back the way I had come, and started back. I had been thinking a lot more about Sasuke too, since I got the time alone. He saw me…stare at him like that. Like that! Urgh…

And I was worrying about it. Like I really did L- Ugh, I have to stop thinking about it.

By this time, Kakashi could have already killed whoever he had to. He could be back with Sakura, waiting for our return. Maybe everything would go right, for once. Like I had planned, it took me a half an hour to get back to Sakura. "Hey Sakura! I'm back!" I called. She leaned over, starring down from her branch. "See anything?" I asked.

"Nope, nothing!" She called back.

I found a nice rock and sat against it. "Keep watching! We can't miss anything!"

"I will!" She answered.

A few minutes passed, and we heard fast-paced footsteps. Seconds later, Sasuke's stature came into view. "See anything?" I asked, bored with the mission at this point.

"No." He answered simply. He sounded bored too. He stood for a few moments, then sat against another tree near me.

More minutes passed, and Sakura came down. "Getting dark…Do you think Kakashi-Sensei killed him already?"

"Maybe, he could have just been far a-"

I stopped, hearing the whooshing like sound of a kunai being pulled through the air. I looked about, and Sasuke had done it. He held the knife in front of him. "Nobody move." He ordered. Sakura shook slightly from where she stood, and I sat motionless. The moments ticked by, and Sasuke's body relaxed. He didn't put the kunai back, however. "Sorry. I sensed strong chakra, then it was gone."

"Sensei?" Sakura tried.

"Maybe." He answered. But he didn't let the knife go. Probably something comforting to tell Sakura for the time being.

A short instant passed, and I heard a squish, but it was so small and so quiet I may have been hallucinating. Footstep? "Did you hear that?!" I asked, standing up.

"I knew it." Sasuke growled, confirming that I hadn't been hearing things. standing up as well. We all tensed up and waited. Sounds and chakra waves got louder and closer. Someone or something was coming.

I could see no one, but suddenly there was a voice. "Are you his little spies?" The voice was deep, but eerily soft. It was coming from behind us.


	11. Fatal

Sakura made an 'Eep!' sound, and we all turned around like lightning. All I could see in front of me was the swampy like woods. "Where are you!?" I demanded. I scanned all in front of and to the sides of me, the others doing the same. Sasuke spun back around, so I followed.

"Konoha sent children?" The voice was still there, but he - I assumed - wasn't in sight.

"Come out, coward!" Sakura called.

Her comment was completely ignored. "They must not have known who they were dealing with. Not that anyone could kill me, anyway."

"Just come out!" I growled. Was this the guy? Where was Kakashi when you needed him? The tapping of footsteps got louder and louder, and we tensed further. Then abruptly, they stopped. "Where are they?" I whispered, referring to the footsteps.

"Maybe he stopped." Sakura muttered.

Sasuke shook his head. "No, he might have moved, or changed positions again."

"You're a smart boy." It all happened at once. From behind us, multiple kunai came simultaneously, and then they became continuous, causing the familiar metallic sound of the metal and the air's friction.

"Move!" Sasuke ordered.

Sakura gasped, and she wouldn't have been quick enough. I grabbed her arm and pulled her with me in my jump. Sasuke used the kunai he was still holding, and deflected the others coming his way with quick hand movements, the blade flashing white with each instant's flick of his wrist. "Stay here!" I told her, leading her out of harms way. She nodded, and I dashed back to Sasuke, the kunai knives slowing their assault. I stayed a few yards behind him.

Amused yet horrifying, quiet laughter filled my ears. "So you can fend off some knives. What else are you good for?" Sasuke and I stared at the figure suddenly approaching us from the camouflage of the shadowy trees.

"Sensei!" Sakura yelled into her headset.

"Sakura? What's wrong?" Kakashi asked worriedly.

"Did you find him!?" She asked, pleading for quicker responses.

"No…" He sensed the panic in her voice.

Then this has to be him. "He…he's with us! Sasuke and Naruto are…"

"Calm down, Sakura. I'm coming. Don't panic."

"R-right!"

A human beings figure, no less. But his voice gave me other suspicions. In the little light that our eyes had adjusted to, we could see him. He was tall and thin, but obviously older. Maybe fifties or sixties. He had long black hair, that went down past his shoulders. He had golden yellow eyes that got just the right gleam from the little moonlight. He had darker marks under his eyes I couldn't tell the color of, thanks to the lack of light. I could tell, however, that his skin was very pale. Much paler then Sasuke's. So much, it sort of…illuminated, in the tiny light. He wore black clothes with a lighter colored over cloak. He had a darker colored rope tied around his waist.

"Who are you?" Sasuke demanded, holding his defensive posture.

"What makes you think you're special enough to know?" He mocked. "You're just children in my way."

"In your way of what?" I growled.

"I have a Jounin to kill."

"So you're the one Kakashi was sent to kill." Sasuke mused.

His face changed, he became even more amused. "Kakashi? They sent Kakashi?" Then he laughed again.

"How do you know him!?" I demanded, still unfaltering from my tense position.

"That isn't any of your business, either. Where is he?" He demanded.

"We don't know." Sasuke answered before I could.

"Then why are you here?" His tone was still amused.

"We're his squad! We were watching out for you!"… _And_ we didn't stay hidden. This probably wouldn't have happened if he never found us. Who is he? And how in the hell does he know Kakashi? How strong was he… And if he was strong, what would he do to us?

"So I should finish you three off and find him." He hissed. Ew. Ew. Ew. He licked his lips, and this must have been where my suspicion came from. His tongue was like…eight inches long!

"What _are_ you?!" Sasuke asked, disgusted.

He ignored him. "I'll just kill all three of you. Starting with the annoying blonde one." I drew back slightly, but rose the kunai higher and squeezed it with both hands. "I don't have time for you children, so I'll make this quick and easy." I swallowed, and tried to move. Then I tried to move again. I couldn't move. He came towards me. "But it won't be painless." He had another kunai in his hand. He intended to rip me open. Stab me. Do something with it. Did random people in the Sound kill innocent Genin for…

"Ah…I can't…" I started, trying to shake free.

"Naruto get out of the way! Move!" Sakura called. "Do something!" Her voice shook.

"Naruto, don't just stand there!" Sasuke growled, but he was panicky, I could hear him trying to hide it.

"I-I can't move!" I said in slight hysterics. He lunged forward at me, aiming to pull up through my chest. More importantly, my lungs, heart, any other vital organs. Even if I knew I wasn't going to die here, I'd find some way to pull through, or have Kyubbi heal me, in such situations, you usually see your life pass right before you eyes. I did. The last thing I saw before I would be stabbed, was Sasuke. Sasuke who didn't know that I - yes, I could think that now, in my last moments.

Then I opened my eyes. There was no pain. I really saw Sasuke, in front of me, with his back to me. Taking the fatal blow that I would have been feeling.


	12. Denial Break

(This is WAY too Déjà vu of the land of waves arc. I'm sorry for stealing that whole concept. Of course there's differences.)

"Aaarrgh!"

It only took a split second for me to figure out what had happened, and then to react. Too much happened at once around me to take in. Sakura screamed, the sound dude said something, Kakashi came. He had obviously gotten the sound ninja away from me. But my vision was blurry and my mind was clouded to everything but Sasuke. My Kunai hit the ground. Sasuke wrapped his arms around his torso, and tried to keep his stature, but slowly went to his knees. I dropped beside him. "Sasuke…"

"Rrrghh! Argh!" He clutched tighter, and growled and screamed from pain. The wound was extremely, extremely deep and bleeding freely, but miraculously hadn't hit any vital organs, as far as I could see. He had no problems breathing, and he wasn't blacking out. Yet.

I unzipped and ripped off my jacket, then wrapped it around as much of the rip as I could, tying the sleeves around his waist to hold it there. I also added pressure with my hands, while trying to ignore the nauseating, iron like smell of the crimson liquid. "Sasuke, just…" I knew it wouldn't make much difference talking.

"Argh! Rrr…It hurts!" He screamed.

I pulled my jacket tighter, trying to stop the blood. "Calm…D-"

He was still growling and gripping at his chest, but his eyes were closing. He was forcing his consciousness, and he couldn't hold it much more. He had lost way too much blood. "Sasuke! Stay with me!" I yelled.

"Ungh…" His eyes closed completely, and he slipped off his knees and on to his side. For a second, I was upset. I panicked. Then all at once, I was angry. I was still oblivious to the world around me. My anger quickly hit Kyubbi's switch, and that was it. I felt my sub-consciousness lose control, and Kyubbi take over. My chakra strengthened, my nails grew, and my senses intensified.

But damn, Kakashi was good.

I don't now how he found a break in whatever he was doing, or what had happened to the sound ninja, but he got to me. He grabbed me by the back of my shirt. I snarled and thrashed with my newly clawed hands, but he ignored it. With a swift, hard punch in my temple, I blacked out.

_Wake up._

_Uhn…_

I said wake up, kit.

_Kyubbi?_

_We got knocked out._

_I know…Kakashi obviously didn't want me out of contro- Hey! What happened to Sasuke?!_

_You think I know?_

He saved me, Kyubbi!  


_He was bleeding! He might die!_

Why don't you just go back to sleep? Your body will be unconscious for awhile. There isn't anything you can do.

_But…Sasuke…_

_There's nothing for you to do._

_Whatever, Kyubbi. _I wanted to yell at him some more, but decided he was right, and it wouldn't help anyway. Sasuke might be dead, Sakura and Kakashi might be killed, and anything could be happening to my body. It felt like minutes in my sub-consciousness, but it could have been days for all I knew, when I finally woke up. Body and all.

It was bright, so I definitely wasn't in the swampy like woods anymore. I woke up to…A ceiling. I was warm, and covered in blankets. I sat up, and surveyed my location. I was in someone's house. There was a window to my left, and a door in front of me. There was a bedside table to my right.

Duh. I was in Iruka's house.

How the _hell_ did I get to _Iruka's_ house?

The door knob of the door in front of me turned, and I jumped, grabbing at one of the blankets. It was Iruka. He smiled for a second then said, "So, you're finally awake. Kakashi must have hit you hard."

"How'd I get here?" I asked, still in shock.

"Kakashi told me as much of the story as he could. He brought you back here. He carried you, along with Sasuke and Sakura back. He let the Sound ninja get away." He explained gently.

"Sasuke! Where's Sasuke!?" I demanded, panicked.

"Calm down," He smiled at my anxiety. It must have meant Sasuke was alright. "Sasuke's in the hospital. He'll be let out tomorrow. You were out for a day and a half." I sighed. Iruka's face got more serious. "How did that happen? Kakashi left that out. He said he didn't see how Sasuke got torn open like that."

'How' wasn't what I was thinking about. I was wondering 'why.' "Oh…he saved me. I might have been me in that position."

"I guess I shouldn't go into details, then." Iruka mumbled. "How are things going with him?"

"Good. Can I go see him?" I changed the subject because I did _not_ want to talk about my feelings right now. I wanted to make sure Sasuke was alive and breathing.

"Sure, sure. Sakura's probably there, anyway." He answered. Damn, of course she was. I wanted him alone.

Minutes later, after going through a head check by Iruka and thanking him, I was on my way to Konoha's infirmary. What do you say? What do you say to someone after they save you from what may have been certain death, had you not had the most amazing sensei in the world? Thank you wasn't nearly enough. I got to the hospital, a large building of three stories and a large amount of square feet. The floors inside were either painted concrete or thin carpet, and the walls were off white with aqua and purple décor. I hurried to the desk at the front of the lobby.

"Hi there!" The lady at the front desk perked up when she saw me come in. She was older woman, in her fifties, probably.

"Which room is Sasuke Uchiha in?" I asked, pulling off a smile.

"102, Sweetie. To the very end of this hall, and the one on the right." She motioned with one hand down the hall.

"Thanks," She stopped me before I could turn.

"Wait, sweetie, is this yours?"

I turned to see her holding my orange and blue jacket, folded and cleaned in both of her hands. The dark red stain was gone. "Yeah," I took it from her. "Thanks." I guess my orange pants were a giveaway.

"Sorry about what happened." She said softer as I walked away.

I pulled my jacket back on as I walked down towards the end of the hall. The concrete made clomping sounds as I walked on it. "104, 103, 102." I stopped, and hesitantly opened the door. "Can I come in?"

"Naruto! You're finally awake!" Sakura's semi-cheerful voice was the last thing I thought about. I was really paying attention to Sasuke, in the bed closest to the door. The other side of the room was curtained off, but vacant. "Sasuke's sleeping, too." She said, and I swallowed my sigh. I sat down next to her on the bench by Sasuke's bed. He didn't have an IV or anything, just a monitor with his vital signs - a usual - and a thick white bandage wrapped all the way up to his neck on his bare, pale chest.

"What happened to him, exactly?" I asked, trying to control my voice and breathing.

She brushed down her half dress and took a deep breath. "After Kakashi-Sensei knocked you out, he did some jutsu and made the four of us transport away. He carried Sasuke and you, and I ran. He carried me whenever I slowed down, too, because he said it was important. He got Sasuke to regain consciousness, too," She changed the tone in her voice, it sounded a bit sadder. "He stopped most of the bleeding, and when we got very close to Konoha, Sasuke started saying he could hardly breathe. Then he couldn't breathe at all. Later, when we got him here, we found out he had a tiny rip in his lung tissue. In his poor condition, it got worse quickly, and tore more." Her voice perked up at the end. "Can I ask you a favor?" She said suddenly.

"Sure, anything." But my gaze at the sleeping Sasuke never faltered.

"I'm going to go get some lunch, I haven't eaten today. Will you stay with Sasuke? Be sure to tell him I'll be right back!" She added.

Like he cares, I thought. "Sure." I lied.

"Thanks, Naruto!" She stood up and dashed out.

Now that she was gone, I could concentrate on Sasuke. His eyes were closed and he was sweating slightly. His face-framing hair stuck to his cheeks. He looked even paler then he normally did. Underneath the sheets, he had pants on, and the white bandages were clean, so obviously the blood had been cleaned up and stopped. "Idiot, doing that," I mumbled. I took one of his hands, the one closest to me, and held it with both of mine, squeezing softly. I couldn't resist. I knew he wouldn't wake up in his conditon, anyway. "I wish you would wake up."

"I guess I could." His eyes flashed open.

I dropped his hand immediately, and the blood rushed to my face. "Were you faking it!?" I growled.

"Yeah," He shifted slightly, pushing his body into sitting it up against the headboard. "But only because of Sakura. If I was awake, all she'd want to do was annoy me."

I took a deep breath, "Why did you do that?"

"Fake sleep, or save you?" He said the second one like he knew it's what I meant anyway.

"Save me, stupid." I whispered.

He didn't reply. Then finally after he noticed my fidgeting, he asked, "You're mad?"

"No! I'm not mad," How could he think that? Who gets mad after someone saves their life? "But just, why?"

"I didn't want to see you get hurt. You're precious to me." His answer was almost immediate, and he said it like it was totally normal. But it sure as hell wasn't totally normal. If my heart was an ocean, and my denial was a bridge I had been building over the ocean, it had just collapsed, and all the people and the cars fell in and drowned. Then the denial bridge broke off one end of the valley, and hit the bottom of my stomach.

I bit my lip and shivered. "I have to go." In just that one moment, I think I broke.

"Hn?" He looked worried.

I stood up, already starting to move. "Sorry, I don't feel well. I'll see you." I left the room as quickly as I could. I couldn't bear to look him in the face. I got out before he could protest, and on my way out, I saw a very confused Sakura. Time went very slowly in my mind as I headed back towards Iruka. I couldn't deny or get away from my feelings anymore. I needed to tell someone the truth, and if I didn't I would explode. "Ruka!" I called, bursting back through his door.

"Hm? Naruto, what's the matter?" He looked more concerned then he should, so my expression must have been worse than I thought. Don't lose it…Please…

"Iruka, I can't take it anymore!" I cried. I was losing it. He came closer and rested his hands on my shoulders. I was close to breaking down. I leaned my head against him.

"Calm down, what's wrong?" Don't say it, Try not to say it, Say it…

"I'm in love with Sasuke!"


	13. Confessions are Better

If you don't like KakaIru, Ignore it please :D It will probably continue to come up, but only in mentioning. There will be very little interaction that I write. I might do a KakaIru story someday.

My stomach churned from mostly shame, and a little discomfort. That was most of the reason I couldn't fight back the tears as much as I wanted to. What I had just said and how I had just said it made me crestfallen. I think I hadn't been held by Iruka since I was seven or eight years old. He just kept telling me to calm down, stop crying.

I knew why I was, but I couldn't stop. I wanted to, because it was pathetic. The ashamed part came from the fact that I had one of those, 'just as bad as Sakura' feelings. I wasn't any better, other then the fact my affection wasn't public. Besides that, it was Sasuke. Who was male, first of all. The sick to my stomach feeling was partly from my desperation and partly from me not eating for nearly two days. Maybe that would help.

"Ruka," I sniffed. I hadn't spoken until now.

"Hm?" He still had his arms around me, and I was still standing up.

"I'm h-hungry." I managed. I couldn't say much else.

He rubbed my head softly. "Compose yourself, and we can discuss this over ramen."

After I had stopped crying and my face had lost its redness, Iruka and I were sitting in Ichiraku, waiting for bowls of ramen. It was empty besides us. Strange, Iruka had the day off today, so the kids must have as well, yet no one else was here. "Tell me everything," He began, his voice still filled with worry and concern.

"I love him, Iruka. I can't think of any other word that describes what this is." I answered, still a little shaken from earlier. Why him? the ramen came, and I instantly stopped to eat some. Iruka did too. It felt amazing on my stomach, even if it wasn't exactly empty. At least, it was empty of food, but not completely absent of everything else.

"Why do you love him?" It wasn't an accusation, he really sounded sincere. "Sasuke isn't exactly…lovable, I guess is the right word. The way I've seen him, he's cold and cruel." First, why do you stare? Now, why do you love?

"The rest of the world sees Sasuke _Uchiha_." I answered. He looked at me quizzically for a moment. "I see Sasuke. Just Sasuke."

"You see what's inside. Not outside." Iruka responded. It wasn't a question.

"Sasuke is cold to the world around him because that's who he is. I think…He doesn't want people to see who he is inside, how he really feels, or acts. Like showing your emotions is a weakness. But…" I started. I thought everything as I said it. I said what came to mind in the moment. "I feel like I know what's inside. Like, he shows me. I love him, not because he shows off, and he's a jerk…" Even though I actually didn't care about that. "But because, He understands me, and I understand him. We've been through a lot. He's really calm, and quiet. He's smart and inside, he really does care. He saved me like that." I really hoped Iruka didn't mind me practically talking to myself. "I always want to help him. He's lost and broken, and all he wants is revenge. Not to mention…" I trailed off. I decided not to say it.

"What?" Iruka asked, noticing my hesitation.

"Nothing." I shook my head, that was too much to spill, even to Iruka.

"Come on, tell me." He smiled slightly. He'd bombard me for life until I told him, so I decided to give in.

I swallowed the ramen in my mouth, and managed, "He's gorgeous." But that was an understatement.

He chuckled. "Well, I guess I understand. Now, what do you plan to do about it?" We both slurped up more ramen.

"I don't know. What should I do?" Oh wait, no. He was going to suggest…

"Tell him the truth." He smiled broadly at me.

"NO!" I cried, probably startling the workers who had left to the kitchen to give us our privacy. "I can't tell him the truth! What if he thinks I'm a freak, and he hates me!?" I asked, appalled that he would even suggest that. That was the worst part about loving Sasuke, or any boy, for that matter, I assumed. You had to keep it from them, because if you said anything, not only would they reject you, they'd never speak to you again.

He laughed, like it wasn't that big of a problem. "Well, that's true. But what if he doesn't? Can you keep it a secret forever?"

I sighed, trying to fool Iruka. I was still hurt. "No, probably not. Iruka?"

He swallowed some more ramen. "Hm?"

"Thanks, Iruka. I love you." I smiled. "Thanks for putting up with me." He was always there for me, and I really couldn't tell anyone I was an orphan, since I had him, which was probably just as good as having a real dad who didn't look anything like you.

He tousled my blonde hair. "Not at all." He grinned, and I beamed underneath him, feeling slightly better.

"So, there you are." We both jolted and turned to look outside the stall. Kakashi stood before us, smiling and rubbing the back of his head. He pulled the curtains out of the way and sat next to Iruka. "Sorry…"

"Kakashi!" I exclaimed, blushing. "How long have you been here!?" I leaned past Iruka to watch for any signs of lying in his visible eye.

"Long enough, Naruto." He answered calmly, without a trace of uneasiness or lying.

I blushed harder. "Don't tell. Please don't say anything…" I begged, trailing off. Kakashi wouldn't say anything to Sasuke, right? Not even if he asked?

"Relax, I won't." He smiled at my embarrassment. "Iruka, do you mind if I talk to you alone?" He asked, kindly implying he wanted me to go.

"Sure thing." He rubbed my hair again. "Why don't you go see Sasuke?" He smirked. He would probably tease me with that for life.

"Sure." I grumbled. "Thanks for the ramen." I walked out, listening to just Iruka's first phrase before I had gone far enough to not hear.

"Don't say it." Iruka challenged.

"I have to." Kakashi replied, his light attitude from earlier transformed into a much more serous one. "They're totally clueless. All we have to do is - "

"No." Iruka interrupted, giving it like an order, even to Kakashi. "They have to find out on their own. Don't say anything."

Kakashi sighed. "But - "

"It takes away from the relationship if you just tell them. It will make it all the better if one of them confesses. It's more magical that way. Where's the feeling if someone else tells you?" Iruka said, shaking his head.

"So, It's better for love, if one confesses to the other." He was quieter, like he had given up now, but was referring to something or someone else.

Iruka turned his head. "If someone tells you, there's no point in confession. That's what makes everything worth it. Then you can laugh later at how stupid you were in the first place for not saying anything right off the back." He hadn't caught on.

Kakashi leaned closer. "So, better if someone confesses." Iruka flicked his head back around, wondering why he kept saying that.

"Not now, Kakashi." Iruka shook his head gently and paid for the ramen, then stood up.

"Hey, Wait-!" He tried.

"Don't say that, either."


	14. Thank you

I really wasn't in the mood to go back and apologize to Sasuke. Not that I didn't want to see him, I just wasn't up for making excuses as to why I had to leave. I would see him when he got released tomorrow, then I could deal with it.

_Hello, Kyubbi._

_I was asleep, you brat. _

I smiled. _Sorry. So, I guess you were right._

_About what?_

_I guess I really am in love with Sasuke._

_I am always right._

His sternness didn't bother me, today. I think maybe now that I was over the shock, my realization would make me happy. Like now that I had dumped the weight off my shoulders, the sore, confused feeling had gone with it. At least, for today. As soon as I saw him again, I knew the desperation that clung to my stomach would return.

I went home and did more training. Push-ups and sit-ups and such. I couldn't think of much else I wanted to do. I wanted it to be tomorrow. I was incredibly happy, actually. My day went smoothly, even if it was boring. There was nothing left to bother me, now that I had gotten the feelings out.

Later that night after eating, I fell asleep easy, too. Dreaming of Sasuke, much to Kyubbi's displeasure. I was probably too relaxed and content, because I forgot to set my alarm. I yawned and sat up, stretching my arms out. I looked at the clock. "11:00 AM! Crap!" I threw off my sheets, and ran into my closet. I threw on my jacket and stumbled around on one foot while trying to get clean pants on.

I hope he hadn't already been released, I wanted to see him out. Hell, he could already be home, at this point. I skipped breakfast. I thought only a moment later that if I was going to see him, it may be better to have food on my stomach. But oh well. I started towards the hospital, running. I could at least check.

About half way there, I saw Sakura walking in the opposite direction. "Good morning, Sakura!" I waved. "Has Sasuke gotten out?"

She looked up at me glumly. "No, he told me he'd be leaving in a few minutes. He said I was being annoying."

Well, she always was. "Oh." I couldn't think of anything else to say. I think she may have been surprised, wondering why I didn't make up some excuse for her to hang out with me, instead. A while back, I may have. Wow.

"See you," She sulked, then continued walking. I waited until she was out of sight before running again. He was still there, I guess, so I could see him.

When I finally got to the building, it was the same lady as before. "Hey! Looking for your friend?" She said, the same perky attitude as before.

"Yeah, is he checking out?" I felt enthusiastic still. I think she was happy my mood had lifted.

"He left awhile ago. But he said he was going to that bunch of training grounds on the outskirts to look for someone." She informed me.

Hopefully, that meant me. "Thanks!" I dashed back out of the hospital, her waving behind me from her desk.

No doubt, I found Sasuke standing in the dirt of our training grounds. He must have thought I come at some point to practice, so he'd catch me. He appeared to be completely fine, and I was seeing him from behind. His wound must have healed quickly.

It wasn't until he turned around, hearing me, that I realized he was still far from healing. Or at least, how bad off I would be if he hadn't saved me. He wasn't wearing his high necked shirt, like he had before. He was wearing a black shirt with no neck, sort of v-lined. It allowed me to see that the bandages were still there, and that they still reached all the way up to his neck. They were still wrapping down his chest, too. I could see them in the v-opening. His eyes were glazed slightly, and he was frowning a tiny bit, though barely noticeable. Even if dull, the pain still must have been there. "Hey," He said simply lifting his hand. "What happened to you, yesterday?"

I knew that would probably be the first thing he would say, and yet I hadn't planned an answer. "I didn't feel so good, is all. Didn't want to throw up there and cause a scene." At leas it wasn't lying all the way around. "Sasuke…" I started. I hadn't even done it yet, and I was already regretting what I was about to do.

"Huh? You okay?" He offered, then abruptly cringed.

Because in one move - God, I so regretted this - I had my arms around him in the most awkward hug I had ever given anyone in my entire life. He stayed with arms slightly raised, then after a few moments, he surprised me. He wrapped his arms back around me, pulling me closer, so close I was pressed tightly against his body. He didn't seem to mind. Had I not been so happy, I may have passed out. I also noticed I was shorter than I thought, compared to him. He was a three or four inches higher. "Thanks, Sasuke." I managed, trying not to choke.

"I've been through worse." He replied.

Only one more silent moment passed before I, well, more like _tried_ to pull back, but the moment I did, he pulled me tighter against him, not wanting me to go anywhere.

Then, I think more than the happiness, it was the adrenaline that kept me standing. His hands traveled higher, gently touching both of my cheeks. He pulled only my face away from his body, and pressed his lips against my forehead. "I'm fine. There's nothing you need to worry about."

Yesterday, my denial hit my stomach. Today, it was my entire heart, only in my throat. Finally I broke away, with less difficulty now. "So, I think we won't have missions today." I breathed, trying to expel what had just happened. It was not physically, naturally, mentally, or instinctively possible that Sasuke Uchiha could somehow feel the same way about me that I did for him. Yet…

"No. Probably not." He replied. His mind seemed to be elsewhere. "So I was thinking of going home." He was talking like he hadn't just done anything outside of the usual.

"You don't want to stay and chat?" I asked, the small talk annoying the hell out of me. I was so pathetic when it came to these things. "I mean…You know, talk."

"Sure."

Moments later, I was sitting beside him on one of the bigger trees. It was wide enough at the base for us both to recline on it. Not his tree. It was completely silent, and we didn't even breathe audibly. "Are you sure you're okay? One hundred percent?" I offered, finally breaking our silence.

"I already told you, I'm fine." He mumbled.

My shoulders slumped. "I was just checking." But I knew he was fine, it was just really all I could say. Since I'm sitting next to him, I might as well go over my conclusion again.

I'm in love with Sasuke Uchiha. I knew that from the very beginning, from the starring, but my mind couldn't accept it. Yet the sick feeling wouldn't go away then. The weird part now, was that I didn't know wether he loved me, somehow, someway, or not. I wasn't assured that he did or didn't.

"Sasuke?" I asked.

"Dobe, I'm fine." He answered automatically.

"No! Not that!" I growled, but I couldn't blame him.

"What?" He looked me in the eyes, taking me seriously now.

"Why did you-" I started, unable to form words. But I had to know. I couldn't get out of what I was trying to say, anyway. Hesitantly, I improvised, bringing my fingers to my forehead, starring at him.

He didn't answer, just looked away from me. "Oh." It was quiet for a long time, so I assumed I wouldn't get an answer. "So much for talking." He said suddenly, making me jump slightly. "I'm going to go home."

I nodded as he got up. "Thank you. For saving me, I mean." I added at the end.

"Yeah. You're welcome."


	15. Leading You On to Know

A few days and missions passed and we didn't speak to each other. At least, he never spoke to me, so I never tried. A few days became an entire week. No talking. It drove me nuts. Nothing. As for the violence at night, I heard mostly screaming and cussing, but nothing physical had happened. Sakura never asked, but she saw how quiet we always were. We never argued, even. We made as little contact as possible with each other. Only when necessary to a mission, or when Kakashi told us to. Kakashi noticed, as well. He stayed behind a lot to talk to Sasuke about who knows what. I wish I knew. I wanted to talk to him, at least, to be civil with him. Be his friend, and not have to pretend like he wasn't there. I wanted to tell him I loved him more then anyone in the world. But I wanted more for him to not hate me. Or laugh at me. But I wasn't willing to live my whole life with him practically, no he is, ignoring me.

Tonight when I got home, I decided to chat with Kyubbi.

_The Uchiha boy hasn't spoken to you in awhile._

_Do you think I don't realize that?_

_Humans aren't as slow as I thought. Mind you, whatever you do, we share a body. I have to go through everything you do._

_Why? What do you think I'll do?_

_I wish you would do nothing._

_What are you going to do about it?_

_If you do something I don't like, I'll make sure you throw up anything you eat for the following days after you do._

_What do you not like? Nothing I would do effects you._

_No sex._

I screamed in the real world, then focused back to our conversation.

_I'll have _you_ know, animals and humans are way different when it comes to sex, Thank you! We do not have sex at two or three years of age like you would!_

_Maybe they should. I would. You expect me to know these things?  
_

_Yes! I _do_! Besides, when _humans_ are in love with each other, _

_they don't just have sex, they grow in a relationship first._

_Well I just-_

_Besides the fact, Sasuke and I would never be together! He'd never love me like I love him!  
_

_Shut up, kit!_

I stopped and was quiet. I had just kept rambling and yelling on about it, and I know it was irking Kyubbi.

_How do you know that?_

I just do. He wouldn't.

_What about last week?_

Being Nice.

_Uh huh. Sure._

But we both knew that wasn't the truth. Why did he do it? It wasn't possible. Period. But that's what I said about not loving him, too.

_Now Shut-up and let me sleep._

_Fine, stupid fox._

I rolled over on my bed and turned out my light. I should probably sleep too, but I wanted to concoct a way to talk to Sasuke, maybe I could even ask him…No, I'll start with just getting him to speak to me again.

How could that bastard do something totally awkward, then not speak to me? I woke up with my alarm that morning, growling. I didn't want to get up. At least not to another day of Sasuke not making any contact. I thought of no special plan, but I would get him to speak to me. Somehow.

"'Morning Naruto!" Sakura called as usual.

"Morning." I muttered, casting a glance at Sasuke. He said nothing and kept his head turned. Sakura was used to the absence of interaction by now. She just shrugged. Then the hour wait for Kakashi began. We got bored to the point where Sakura and I were playing tic-tac-toe in the dirt with sticks. Sasuke watched with little interest.

"Good morning!" Sakura and I were quick to act when we heard his voice.

"You're late _again_!" We accused loudly.

"Well, I just-" Kakashi started, smiling. More like smirking, but you never knew. It was because we couldn't do anything about it.

"Just get on with the mission." Sasuke hissed. His excuses were still crap.

"We don't have one. I'm going to each Sakura some chakra focusing skills, and you two are going to spar. We clear?" He asked. Sasuke and I nodded. He hadn't ordered us to do that in a while, so I knew Sasuke would be reluctant. This was the perfect opportunity…

Sakura and I got up from sitting by our makeshift game board. "What do I have to do?" She asked.

"We'll leave the boys alone. I'll teach you the technique somewhere else." Kakashi answered.

"Oh…Okay." She sounded disappointed. She probably wanted to watch Sasuke, as usual. Kakashi shot Sasuke a glance I couldn't understand, and Sasuke, to my amazement, didn't glare. He just nodded. He looked paler then usual. "Have fun!" Sakura called, as she and Kakashi walked away. I watched them until they disappeared. That was obviously a mistake.

Suddenly a hand was grabbing for my throat, and I only took a split-second to react. I grabbed Sasuke's wrist and twisted myself around. With that we began hand-to-hand combat. He never once looked me in the face, just kept his head down, concentrating on blocking my feet and finding openings through my own evading hands. He probably wasn't just being a show-off in doing so, either. He was just doing it to remain without contact. "Sasuke?" I asked, hands still moving. Are combat was still going on without I break. I tried speaking to him.

He looked up slightly, aiming to punch me in the ribs but being blocked by my hand. I kicked at his shin but missed as well. His hair shadowed his eyes. "Hn?" Oh. My. _God_. A response. Our fighting did not cease ever as we spoke. "Why aren't you speaking to me?" It was harder than I thought to concentrate, think about the problem, and talk. He altered his tactics, and grabbed at my blocking hand. I tried to twist free, but his grip was unbreakable. Much stronger than before. He grabbed my other arm, and twisted them in an 'X'-fashion across my chest. Not hard enough to hurt, but to keep me there. I didn't bother kicking at him. I wanted to know.

"It bothers you?"

I realized how much I missed his deep, clear, brooding voice. It was like he was speaking thought. It was versatile. It could be loud, quiet, filled with rage and hate, or comfort and love. "I miss talking to you." I said my thoughts aloud. "Why are you?" I said, a more loud, demanding tone.

He stared at me hard for a moment, then freed my arms. "Because I did too much."

I blinked, and even though they were released, I didn't move my arms. "What?"

"Nothing." He turned. "If you wanted me to talk to you, you could have asked."

He made _me_ sound stupid in this situation. "Okay, I want to talk to you. Now." Sasuke turned back around, and looked at me expectantly. "Because you did to much when?" I let out the breath I didn't know I had been holding.

His eyes flashed. "Do I have to tell you?"

"Yeah, you have to." I ground out, thinking I knew the answer.

"I just did too much. I let on too much, and now I'm fixing my mistake." He answered, speaking in confusing terms. And yet, I knew exactly what he meant, but I somehow didn't. I was torn between what it actually was and if I actually believed it.

"I've seen you make no mistakes." I muttered. "And…Let on to what?" I knew if he answered that, my thoughts would be clarified.

"Absolutely nothing."

I didn't want to believe it. I knew it was a lie, first of all, and I realized it was very hard to get an Uchiha to crack. I felt like I already knew the truth, but would not have another break down until I knew for sure. "Bull crap, Sasuke. Tell me." I said, but I surprised myself when my voice was still soft.

"No. It doesn't matter, anyway."

"But it's something!" I answered. I felt like an idiot, we were having the dumbest yet most meaningful conversation ever. Talking about _something_ without being aloud to say what it was.

"Yeah." He replied, his armory cracking.

"Please?"

He put one hand on my shoulder and I tried not to jump. He touched my forehead with his other hand. "When I kissed you. I did too much." He had said the 'K' word. Mother of…

I swallowed hard. I knew the answer, but I had to get him to say it. "Too much of what?" I swallowed my choke. He shifted his arms and locked them around my neck, pulling my head against his chest.

"Letting you too close to knowing that I'm in love with you."


	16. For Forever?

PLEASE excuse the fact that this chapter is totally mushy/angsty/emo. I was feeling down when I wrote this, so it made it easy.

Was it possible to actually - because I know some people claim - drop dead on the spot, without anything physical affecting you? I might have. My brain felt like it was totally possible, but the fact that Sasuke was keeping me upright in his tight hug prevented that. Sasuke's arms loosened and dropped to his sides, and I stumbled to keep my balance. I _had_ been depending on his arms. He abruptly turned around but didn't move. He probably didn't want to look me in the face. I knew exactly what he would say next.

"There. It's wrong. I know. You hate me. I know." He ground out. "I'm sick. I'm a freak. I know." Here Sasuke was. He told me he was in love with me, and I was him. He was saying all these horrible things about himself, and I hadn't said anything yet. I wasn't sure what to name the emotion. I was in shock that he actually - Despite my theories from earlier - _did_ feel that way about me. But I was also happy, thinking everything would work out. I was also slightly hysterical, knowing I might cry. I was beginning to be such a wuss. But at least it wasn't because I was sad. Nothing came to mind to say that was good enough. So instead, I stepped closer to him and fixed my arms around his waist, pushing against his back. I must have surprised him, because he grabbed my hands, spun back around, and in doing so pulled my arms off him. "Naruto?" He asked.

I stayed quiet.

"You don't hate me? You aren't going to laugh?"

Oh screw it, don't try to hold back right now. "Hate you?" I felt my eyes water. "I love you." I put as much emphasis on love as possible, but my voice was just a little too shaky.

We stood still for a long time, awkwardly. He still had a hold on my hands. After what seemed more like a life time than thirty seconds, he said, "Really?"

"I thought _I_ was being too obvious." I drawled. My voice was cracking.

Another few seconds passed, and I couldn't take us just standing there. I nearly knocked him over, wrapping my arms around him and pushing my head underneath his chin. Shaking all the while. "Damn it, I love you."

Maybe I _did_ knock him over. Then I realized he had just dropped, sliding to sitting and taking me with him. He shifted me more into his lap and pulled me closer. A mutual understanding and realization instantly formed between us. He believed me. He didn't even question. "Why didn't you tell me that?" He whispered against my hair, which he was resting his head on.

"Why do you think I d-didn't?" I choked out. "If I t-told you, and you hated me, I c-couldn't live like that!" I shut my eyes repeatedly and bit my lip.

"But I'm always so horrible to you. How could you?" He rubbed circle patterns on my back.

"I d-don't love you because you're a jerk." I whispered, unable to cry. "I love you because-" I sniffed in between pauses. "Because you're calm, smart, you always protect me. I admire you because you're strong…I've seen the side of you that I love that you don't show anyone else. I want to help you, Sasuke. You're the only equal to…ever understand me. I feel like I understand you."

"You do understand me. I don't care if you're annoying. I've never felt so responsible for taking care of anyone in my life. You're kind and brave. You persevere in everything. I just love you, for a million reasons more I can't explain." I swallowed, feeling better. I felt the relief of knowing that this was okay. This was right. Everything I had thought was a problem had lead me to one of the best things that had ever happened. From the staring, to the considering, the admiring, the loving, and then being loved back. They say the broken road always leads to good things. "I wanted to tell you," He said suddenly. "A while ago. When you told me about the Kyubbi, and about the people - doing those things to you - I knew what I could do to end it. But I knew about my feelings, and I knew if I told you, it would be too awkward and you wouldn't consider it…" He rambled on.

Finally I interrupted. "Tell me what?"

"I thought that, if you stayed with me, no one would ever know where you were. You'd never be hurt. I live alone, in the Uchiha district where no one but me ever goes. You'd be safe if you stayed with me." He answered.

Safety. Not having to live in fear my whole life sounded amazing. "Can I?" I asked.

"Yeah. I don't want those people hurting you."

I blushed and grinned. "I told Iruka I thought you were gorgeous." It was random, but I had to say it. "You are."

He smirked, I knew he did even though I couldn't see it. "Iruka knows?" He inquired. "So does Kakashi. He's been sort of guiding me." He admitted. "I told him I thought you were irresistibly adorable."

"Iruka's been helping me, too." I looked up at him, and we stared at each other.

"Those bastards," We said at the same time.

"I'm sure they knew all along!" I whined. "How could he not tell me!?" Sasuke probably thought the same. I sighed. Maybe he thought it better if we found out. We never continued that conversation. "Sasuke? Does this mean we're together? I'll always be with you? My whole life?"

His expression changed. His eyes lowered and his smile faded. "I don't know. It's not that I won't stop loving you," he added quickly, seeing my surprise. "My purpose in life will always be…Get up."

"Get up?" What the hell? His expression changed all at once again, now he was a complete blank. He stood up, pulling me up by the arm.

"Wipe your face and act natural." He remained blank. I did as I was told. He stepped more to the side of me. Now I understood why. This would be a problem. Sakura and Kakashi came back, and I realized Sasuke had sensed them coming just in time. Sakura looked tired, but otherwise fine. Kakashi didn't have any expression in his visible eye.

"So, who won guys?" Sakura asked on getting close enough. We both looked at each other. I was about to say him since he had grabbed my arms and made me stop.

Then he immediately answered, "It was a tie. We both won." His careful wording made me get it. I didn't bother hiding my smile.

She blinked, surprised. "Oh, I thought you'd win, Sasuke."

"Sasuke, Naruto. I need to talk to you two before you go. Sakura, you can head home." Kakashi said suddenly.

"Oh right, sure." She replied, then grinned at Sasuke. "I'll see you tomorrow, Sasuke!"

He didn't answer, just looked expectantly at Kakashi. He waited until Sakura was completely out of sight before speaking. "How have things been lately, for you two?"

I wanted to say, cut the crap. We know you know, and we're pissed. "Things have been good, Sensei." I answered. Sasuke nodded in agreement.

"No problems? You've been quiet. Both of you."

I tensed then immediately relaxed. Sasuke grabbed my hand and held it. "No problems," He smirked, and Kakashi blinked in surprise.

"I see." He smiled. "Well, you're free to go."

He disappeared. "Damn it, Kakashi. Just you wait until tomorrow." Sasuke muttered.

"You were saying?" I asked, ignoring the fact he was gone involuntarily.

"Saying what?" He didn't sound like he had forgotten.

"Never mind." I guess. He obviously didn't want to talk about it. Don't worry about it…

"Hey, Naruto." I looked sidelong at him. "I'm still and always will be your rival." He smirked.

I smirked back. "Hell yeah, I knew that!" I did. That was the way I wanted it. I knew now my depression wouldn't come back. Not for a very, very long time, if not forever.


	17. Mansion

So, if you read the original copy of this story, you saw this. But hell, I'm gonna leave it on the redux because it's freaking hilarious.

..are you out of your ** mind? ... Just... what in the hell does any of this have to do with Naruto? Nothing... you can say you're using them as a proxy... but then all you're admitting is you didn't want to write about Naruto but you wanted to try and cookie-cut what you psychotically assume to be their character traits for yet another one of these trite, hackneyed 800 million of 'em yaoi fanfics. ...just go watch ** brokeback mountain already you useless waste of carbon. We could have thousands of good pencils, but instead we got you: a mutated monkey who mentally masturbates and gibbers ** at people instead of flinging it. I could further insult your intelligence, your writing (grammatical errors by the way and poor pacing), and a litany of other things but mostly I think I'll point out the obvious.. something you might've missed in your egress into yoursicko-**-in-the-head make believe world YOU ARE A LOSER. YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO YOUR PARENTS YOU DISGUST THEM, ME, AND EVERYONE ELSE YOU ARE HIDDEN ON THE NET BUT REPUGNANT TO ALL OTHERS AROUND YOU SAVE FOR OTHER DEVIANTS. Only other mentally challenged societal leaches will appreciate you... and only then because you serve as a false case to them that their own actions are okay. THEY'RE NOT. You're not okay. whine, **, or whatever now... just dont ignore. Accept that you are not okay as you are. GET HELP.

First of all, his grammar/spelling is wrong, so he shouldn't make fun of mine, although I do actually appreciate the fact he pointed out something I'm aware of, being the grammar, and the poor pacing. (Update: Yeah, why I'm redoing this. Thanks, buddy.) If there are 800 million yaoi fics out there, why am I so BAD? He points it out himself that there are so many and so many people are doing it, so I must really be the worst of all.

I have TWO fan fictions on yaoi. One with more 'straight' couples.

This is simply me writing what I want to write. If he had a problem with the couple, the fact that it was yaoi, or the way I portrayed it, he should have left his grammar criticism and been done with it. I will NOT let anyone tell me what I am or what's right and wrong. He thinks me and all of the people supporting me, (Reading this fan fiction,) Have no minds and need mental help. He asked me to not ignore him, and then what does he do? Signs it anonymous. This story will continue, and I WILL not let him take down my self esteem. This is fan fiction, and it was made so we could do whatever we wanted to twist up an original story line. Thank you for listening to my rant :D I hope to see your opinions in reviews :D

It was around nine o' clock at night when we finally got back from a stupid D-rank Kakashi ha sprung on us near the end of the day. I'd finally get to see his house. The Uchiha district was a secluded little entrance in the main district that gave way to a pretty, village like setting. There were buildings of all kinds, like a mini society that could have done fine without Konoha, and all of them sported the same logo like the one on the back of Sasuke's shirts.

"You're kidding me, right?" I asked.

"Uh no, I'm not." Sasuke answered, confused.

"And you live here alone?" If there was anything more ridiculous then his hair, which looked great on him and only him, it was his house. If house is what you could call it. We were standing at his front door, and I was staring up in awe at the two-story.

"There use to me more people in it," He said, understanding my point.

"Yeah, four! You live in a _mansion_." I answered, still starring at the building in front of me. "It's _huge_!"

"My dad was the leader of the clan. He had a big house." His voice didn't have the same tone. I knew he was holding back more emotion. This whole subject was touchy. Very touchy.

"Well…yeah, anyway, can I see the inside?" I asked, trying to drop subject. I probably shouldn't have made such a big deal out of it. I didn't want to bother him, now that he was doing so much for me.

"Sure…Please don't break anything." He added after a short pause.

"Hey!" I yelled back. He didn't answer, we both knew I was clumsy.

Sasuke stepped forward onto his porch and opened the sliding door. I followed him in, and copied him when he stepped on his heels to take off his shoes. He left them more orderly then I did, mine strewn within a few feet of each other.

The inside, like the outside, was big and beautiful. However, it still had that eerie, ghostly feel to it. It was dusty, so much he must have never dusted it. Not to mention, in the corner of my mind, it bothered me to be walking through a murder site. Aside from the dust, his kitchen, sitting room, and bathroom on the lower floor were all unorganized. He showed me through all of them, and I noticed some clothes and even trash in places. "Sasuke, are you secretly a house slob?" I asked.

He glared at me momentarily then said, "A little, I suppose. Like you're any better."

"Only when it comes to food." I replied, feeling high and mighty. I left expired food in the house, and had no means of organizing things that weren't refrigerated. He showed me the backyard through another door on the side of the house, it wasn't very big, - I had expected much bigger seeing his house - but it was complete with a fountain.

Then suddenly he said, "The rooms are upstairs, but I'm not sure where you should sleep. There's my single bed in my room, and my parents room. I don't really want anyone in there." I could understand that. I could also understand why he didn't even mention his brother's room. He had probably put boards over the door, or some other extreme. Went in and destroyed it, I don't know. Something.

"In a house this big, you're telling me you don't have a guest bed?" I asked a bit sarcastically.

He glared at me again, but then it quickly subsided to a smirk. "Yes, I am. You can sleep in my bed. I have a futon I can lay out on the floor." He said, causing me to shake my hands.

"Is that really nessic-" I started, but he cut me off.

"Yes, it is. Come upstairs."

The upstairs was a hallway that led straight out another door. This lead to an open air balcony on the side of the house, over looking the yard from earlier. I followed him all the way to the end of the balcony, passing three doors. As I suspected, the second door we passed was boarded shut. At the third door he stopped, opening it. His room was the most unorganized of all. Kunai, scrolls, and books lay scattered across his floor. His bed was on the back wall, centered. He had black sheets and two white pillows. The bed wasn't maid, either. "Sasuke, in the morning I'm organizing your house. At least this room." I said, no questioning tone in my voice. "I can't believe supposedly perfect Sasuke is a slob." The smile could be heard in my voice.

"Being unorganized and being a slob are two different things." He said matter-of-factly.

"Sure. Whatever." I answered, shaking my head.

"I'll be right back." He said suddenly, leaving the room.

I looked at the floor. Why not start now? It was the least I could do since he intended to let me _live_ here. I started with the scrolls, rolling them up and re-tying them. When I had collected the three unrolled ones from the floor, I went to his dresser to set them there. It was on the right wall, with a shelf above it. I stopped, seeing something of interest. Our team seven picture, framed and in the center of his dresser. I picked it up and sat on his bed, starring at the graphic. My copy had been forgotten, probably pinned to a bulletin board or in a drawer. I didn't like it, or him, very much then. "What are you looking at?" I jumped, hearing Sasuke's voice right over my shoulder. "Oh that. Don't you have one?"

"I got one," I answered. "But I don't know where it is. I'm surprised you actually kept it, and framed it, and put it where you could see it - " I trailed off. It didn't sound much like Sasuke at all.

He shrugged without much motion. "It has you on it." The simple way he answered made me almost giggle, but I held back.

"Where'd you go?" I asked.

"To get that." He pointed at a futon that was now upright on his floor. I hadn't heard him come in and set it down, weird. It was a thin, smaller then twin mattress. It was white with a white sewn on pillow, and he brought up a blue blanket that he had thrown over it.

"Do you think something interesting will happen tomorrow?" I asked, totally off topic. I was walking around picking up the kunai knives and stacking the books.

"Maybe…Naruto, I just thought of something."

I finished picking up everything, then sat down on his un-maid bed. "Yeah, what?"

He sat on the futon at the floor. "When we're around Sakura, should we pretend to hate each other still?" I nearly cringed at the thought. Sakura was a complication. I knew Sasuke would willingly tell her off and inform her he was with me, but I didn't want to hurt my friend. She liked Sasuke a lot.

"Is pretending to hate each other possible?" I asked.

"Yes. We still argue and yell at each other. Even now. Well, not now, but when the need arises." He replied.

"If we slip up, we tell her. Otherwise, we just…act natural?" I offered.

"Act natural." He repeated.

I sighed, "Are you really going to sleep on that thing? You should sleep in your own-" I started.

"Leave it alone, I'm fine." He cut me off. "But just incase something _interesting_ happens," He used emphasis on interesting teasing me about earlier, "We should get to sleep. It's late. We can move your stuff over here later. I'll have a clean shirt for you in the morning, but you'll have to stick to your pants and jacket." Totally inhuman sounding for Sasuke to be _speaking_ this much. It was weird, but I liked his voice and we weren't arguing. I couldn't complain, it was nice. And now, even more, I could see he actually had a personality. It was hard to tell before. Actually, not hard to tell, I had labeled him show-offy jerk. He still was, but he had a personality he showed me now that I had never seen.

"No problem!" I replied, unzipping my jacket. "I just won't sleep in it." I left it hanging on his bedpost.

He rolled over on his side. "One more thing, do you snore?"

I growled and said, "Like you don't?"

"Maybe I do." He replied. I could hear the smirk in his voice.

I organized the covers on his un-maid bed, then lifted them. Still totally awkward, but I didn't find my self much bothered by it. I rolled up in a ball underneath the sheets, and tested the pillow. It smelled like him, a scent I had got earlier today, being so close to him.

"Hey Sasuke?" I asked quietly.

"Yeah?" He mumbled.

"I love you." It was still hard to say.

"I love you, too."


	18. Nightmare

Bold font is a dream.

"**Where am I? Hello?" I called out in my dim surroundings. I couldn't see anything, and wondered why I wasn't in Sasuke's room. Then it hit me, I was dreaming. "Hey! Answer me!" The only time I couldn't hear Kyubbi was in my dreams. It was a corner of my mind that was locked and out of our mental range.**

**The dim, unable to see in surroundings were suddenly very clear. I was outside somewhere, and it was very dark. I could see little, the moonlight was the only light source. I was in the woods, deep into them, it seemed. But nothing moved. Then I started to hear shouts, and wind began blowing. As I fell deeper asleep, more detail appeared to make it seem more life like.**

"**Hold it back!"**

"It's too strong! It'll destroy the-"  


**It was all very faint, but I followed it to the source. It took a long time before I felt the tremors. I knew I should have been feeling them a while ago, but they had not materialized in my dream until now. The ground shook and I lost my balance, falling on my butt. I heard loud roars, and screams of more people.**

**  
Then it turned into a nightmare. The screams were those of people right before they died, and the roars were coming from the beast killing them.**

**  
Kyubbi. I was still far away from all of this, but I could feel the earthquakes when he lifted a paw and slammed it back down. I could hear the screams as if they were next to me, an effect of the dream. "Kyubbi! Stop! NO!" I screamed at him, partially in the real world, partially in my head - so I might break through the mental barrier and speak to him - and partially in the dream.**

**But he couldn't hear, much less the people. I was miles away. I felt tears roll down my face, and voices fill my head. All more effects of the dream. I screamed again. "Kyubbi, NO! don't hurt anyone! STOP!" Then I gasped an it was over, and the scenery changed. It was warm and bright. I looked at my hands and body, I was smaller. Younger. Around seven years old, maybe. The voices in my head were clear and rang loudly. **

"**He's nothing but a monster."**

"I don't see why we have to let him live."

"He killed all those people, horrible beast."

And as much as I wanted to think Kyubbi was the one who had did that, and it was just my body, I couldn't. I was harboring the creature with my body, that had** killed all those people. It was like I was a monster, as they said. **

**The scenery changed again, and it was dark. I couldn't see anything. I tried to open my eyes, for I thought they might be closed. They **were** closed. They grazed against fabric. I was blindfolded. I shut them again to avoid irritating my eyes.**

"**I don't care what lord Hokage says. We kill the monster now."**

**With those words, I forgot I was dreaming. I thought I was no longer in Sasuke's house, but back at my own home, the tormentors from before were ready to stop tormenting, and kill. I screamed and cried, and I even managed, "Sasuke! Help me!" Even though it hurt my pride a fraction to do so.**

**  
"Not so tough now, are you?"**

I realized my arms were tied up, so I tried releasing Kyubbi's power. In dreams, I couldn't. I had thought this was reality, but I still couldn't form a link between us. I heard the footsteps now, then suddenly, someone grabbed my hair and pulled.

"You're nothing but a monster. No one loves you. No one ever will." That was Sasuke's voice.

Then I screamed, ear-splitting,

Then woke up.

I woke up in a cold sweat, panting. My face was wet with both perspiration and tears. I rubbed my eyes and attempted to focus, then saw the blurry shape of Sasuke looming over me, starring with concern. He noticed I woke up. Remembering his voice in my dream, I blinked and held still, though my panting racked my body. I couldn't quite tell if I was still dreaming.

Sasuke reached out and stroked one side of my face. "Calm down. It was just a dream. It's over. I'm here. It wasn't real…" He only continued with his assurances, because I wouldn't relax. I don't think I had ever had a nightmare that bad. Being in Sasuke's house probably wasn't helping, knowing what kinds of things had happened here.

I noticed when he got up, that he was kneeling on the bed in front of me. When he got up, I almost pulled him back, but just waited. I really didn't want to be alone. He left the room, and came back a moment or so later. He had a washrag dipped in cold water, and a glass of water. He kneeled back in front of me, and laid the rag against my forehead. He held out the water, and my hands shook when I reached for it. I shook harder when I tried to drink it. "Try to relax." He said gently, my panting starting to slow.

It took a long time for me to erase the thought of the dream, and for my breathing to be even. After I was calm, he let a while pass before he spoke. "Are you okay now?" He asked first, gently removing the rag.

I nodded, then pulled my body out of the blankets. I was unbelievably hot, for the sweat was no longer cold. It was burning. More then anything I wanted to hug him, but I would rather not overheat. I sat on my knees as well, facing him. He probably caught on to the fact I didn't want to talk, so he did. "I heard you screaming. I've been trying to wake you up for a long time. It didn't matter what I did, you wouldn't stop."

I just starred at him, unable to speak. "You called my name a few times, and yelled for my help. You screamed amazingly loud and woke up."

I nodded. I tried to form words. "Scary."

He reached behind me, and ran one hand up and down my back, then rubbed circles like he had earlier. "Try to tell me what happened."

I breathed in and out once, then I started to somewhat talk. "Kyubbi was killing people. Then they wanted to kill me. You-" I stopped. It would hurt him to know I was having dreams like that.

He didn't egg me on to tell him, either. "Can you go back to sleep?"

"I don't know." I shook my head slowly, small drops of liquid falling off in the process. "I don't want to have another nightmare." I mumbled. "Not like that."

"I know. It's hard. After something happens, it haunts you forever. It's impossible to make it go away." He dragged his hands back up my spine and wiped my forehead again.

I leaned into the touch, then eventually got off my knees and laid against him. Now the sweat had aired off and I was cold again. "Stay up here." I mumbled. I thought if he was closer, I might not have the nightmares.

He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and flipped us over so we were both lying on our sides, facing each other. I snuggled closer, gripping the sides of his shirt. "Sure," He muttered in response. It took me a while to fall asleep, the dream still fresh in my head, but Sasuke helped immensely. It was like having an oversized teddy bear.


	19. The Begining of The end Of the Begining

So, this chapter is a time skip of sorts, but Naruto explains in some detail everything that happened and his feelings.

I was finally right about something Sasuke wasn't. Something interesting _did_ happen the next morning. The Chunin exams were announced. Over the course of the past few months, so many things happened. Sasuke and I hadn't moved much in relationship. We still haven't gotten to the kiss on the mouth stage, I'm not sure why. Sometimes it's still weird, but I want to do more. But I couldn't say that out loud to him, that's even worse.

It started with the Chunin exams, like I said. The next day of normal, crappy training, we met three sand ninja, (Gaara, Kankuro, and Temari,) and wondered why they were there. This led up to Kakashi finally telling us that Genin were coming from everywhere for the Chunin exams. Then he said that he had enrolled us! Totally awesome!

Sasuke and I were doing an okay job of hiding our relationship from Sakura, and I think Iruka went crazy on me - the good kind of crazy - the first time I told him. He and Kakashi were both happy, and things were building up between them.

The first part of the Chunin exams was the written exam, which was freakishly hard. I made it through that, along with everyone else. All of the Genin from my graduating class in Konoha made it through. Then when we reached the stage of the exams where we had to take scrolls through the forest of death. You could take scrolls from other players, but you had to make it through to the end with yours in tow, and you had to capture the other scroll that you didn't have. Not everyone would go on but most everyone I knew did.

We met that man again. The one who tried to kill us in Kakashi's assassination mission. It was just as horrifying, but not as surprising. I got separated from Sasuke and Sakura, after we planned to split up, - and eaten by a snake! EW! - then when I found them again, he was there. A battle between him and I with Kyubbi's chakra led to me being knocked out. There wasn't much more to it. I don't know what happened after that. I got to see the effects when I woke up. I woke up after everything was over and we were back into the exam.

Sakura had all her long hair cut off short. Sasuke looked the same, but since then, he's been talking to Sakura more and more often. I hoped that was a good sign, since he was getting along with her. I had to wonder what they were talking about, though. As for Sakura's hair, how could that happen? She liked her long hair.

Anything could have happened when I was knocked out, but no one told me. Then Sasuke was sent to the hospital for unknown reasons. No visitors aloud. I still don't know why. He was absent for the next part of the Chunin exams, along with Kakashi.

I worried about him a lot. I had overheard Kakashi telling Sakura that everything would be just fine, but she didn't seem convinced. Something seriously bad had happened when I was out. I was missing an important part of vital information.

We passed that part of the exam, and I knew bad things were starting to happen. Suspicious people and some Sound ninja were there. The Hokage and some of the Jounin and exam leaders whispered to each other about things. I heard one of them Say something about Sasuke, but I couldn't hear what. It made me wonder.

During the next round, we had prelim battles. I made it through all of these, as well. Sasuke still hadn't come back. With the Chunin exams, I never got a chance to see him.

After the prelim battles, we had a huge chunk of time to practice and train. I went without seeing Sasuke, still. I hoped that when I saw him again, I could ask him just _what_ happened in the forest of death. He had gotten out of the hospital, and started training with Kakashi for the last round.

I wanted Kakashi to train me too, but he found another trainer, (That pervert Ebisu!) for me. Then I met my current mentor, Jiriya. I mean, pervy sage. He was actually one of the legendary Sanin, and he offered to train me, after showing him my sexy jutsu. It was an odd friendship, and it just sort of…happened. He seemed to know some things about me, and I wondered why. He taught me some chakra control and such. He was totally awesome and strong, and he promised to teach me a special technique that he had once taught the fourth Hokage. The fourth Hokage's jutsu! YES!

Then before I knew it, the last round was coming up.

The last round was a to the death elimination, (Or until someone gave up, or Genma called it off,) and the last one standing after so many rounds would become Chunin. ONE Chunin out of that whole freaking exam! Chunin could also be chosen by the Hokage during the matches.

In the middle of one of the matches, the ANBU squad that was watching sounded an alarm. Then things in Konoha started to unravel. That man from the sound was back. There was more to him then just a powerful ninja, I knew. I also worried that more things I was unaware of were going on. Maybe something to do with Sasuke. Something bad.

I found out about Gaara, too. The sand ninja we had met in the beginning. Like me, he was a Jinchuruki. He housed the one-tailed Shakaku. Gaara was insane, to put it lightly. He wanted to kill everyone on earth but himself. He went on a rampage, and Sakura, Sasuke, and I, finally back together, went after him. At the same time this happened, the third Hokage was fighting that sound Ninja. During our fight with Gaara, Sasuke had weird, black marks on his skin. It put his whole body into a shocked like state and pain, and he couldn't fight in the beginning, but got better. I eventually defeated Gaara and saved them both. I feel quite accomplished!

But when we had defeated Gaara, the sound ninja had killed the third Hokage. The third Hokage was dead. There wasn't anything worse that could have happened. The sound ninja got away, and wasn't seen after that. They had a funeral for him that the entire village attended. Everyone wore black cloaks and brought flowers. That was one of my best friends, Konohamaru's grandfather, and an important leader and inspiration to everyone in the village. When it was over, though, things seemed to lift in spirits.

The village was still a wreck, and without a Hokage, but things calmed down for awhile. That brings me to the present. This is here and now, after the funeral. Sakura, Sasuke and I were walking home. No one had spoke yet, and it stayed that way, though things weren't exactly gloomy anymore. We were silently honoring the Third. Sasuke and I waited until Sakura had left and was out of complete sight before heading towards home.

We held hands, but didn't speak until we got back to the Uchiha district and in his house. "You hungry?" He asked, lifting off the black cloak and before dropping it on the ground, (I glared) hung it up by his door.

"Yeah, kind of." I copied him and hung mine up. At least what had happened to the Hokage didn't make anything dreary. Maybe tense, but at least not upsetting. Perhaps now I could ask him about the forest of death and those black marks. I would wait it out, get through the rest of the day, and then ask. The personality I had seen behind his jerky exterior was slowly fading. Not to give way to the bad things, but just disappearing. He was turning blank. Something was wrong, but I didn't know anything, and he never told me.

I wanted the Sasuke I fell in love with to be back. He had changed.

I thought it had something to do with what happened with the black marks, but I couldn't be sure what those were from, or why they were there. What else could it…Oh. His brother. His revenge. He's still training to be stronger and stronger, but sometime soon in his life, he'll want to find him so he can kill him.

I wish his family never would have been killed, so this wouldn't be a complication. I wanted Sasuke to forget about his brother and his revenge, and just be happy. "I moved most of your stuff excluding the furniture over. I took the instant ramen boxes from the kitchen. You should make some."

"We haven't seen each other in a while. At least, not without Sakura, and not with out someone wanting to kill us. How have things been?" I said it in a tone that made it seem like I was pointing out something obvious. Maybe I could make him tell me indirectly.

"Good. I've gotten pretty good with Kakashi training me," He answered, noticing the slight hostility and my voice, and making his sound better. "He's teaching me his chidori technique he used in the land of waves. Who's been training you?"

"This guy I met named Jiriya. He knows Kakashi, and knows a lot of stuff about me. He said he'd teach me some special jutsu, but I don't know what it is," I answered. "I'm probably going to head out to another town in the morning with him."

He stared at me for a moment then nodded. "I was just going to practice and train, anyway," He quickly changed subject. He walked past me and into his kitchen. "Come on, I always cook."

I smiled in spite of myself. "You're not telling me you want me to make you instant ramen, are you!?"

"So what if I am?" He turned back to glare at me, but only playing.

I laughed and ran in, "I'm going, I'm going!" I always wanted things to be this way. But I didn't know, that tomorrow destinies would alter, and things would turn on us both completely. Bad things.


	20. Why us?

This would be a good example of a chapter I would like to write from Sasuke's point of view, because if you watch this episode, (83) Naruto was doing boring things. Sasuke was running around like mad and thinking about Itachi.

Also, this isn't…fan fiction like. There are teeny, tiny differences and some script change to what happened in the real episode, but it's basically me just following an episode, deepening Naruto's thought. It's very much so like re-writing an episode with twists. SORRY! I know you're never supposed to start a sentence with 'and', but I'm just using it for artistic purposes. I see it a lot in professional books.

The danger I would face today was already here. I just didn't know it. I woke up at around nine in the morning, an okay time for not having an alarm clock. I was in Sasuke's bed, alone. He had put the futon back in storage awhile ago. Since my horrid nightmare, we had always slept together.

Whoa, that sounded wrong. In the same bed, is what I meant. I yawned, stretching similarly to a cat. I noticed paper on his nightstand, he left a note.

_Went to training grounds early. I'll see you when you come back. Have fun with Jiriya. I love you._

I sat up to read it better, then stuck my tongue out at it. Later I would have to tell him that was totally lame. But I really didn't think that. After a while of figuring out for the umpteenth time how to make his shower work, showering, and packing some essentials, I headed out to find Jiriya. I found him near the gate out of Konoha. I had to ask, since it was the first thing that popped into my head. "So Pervy Sage, what's this new jutsu?!"

"It's _Jiriya_!" He growled automatically. "Now listen, that jutsu will take tons time and tons of training. Maybe months, or even a year. You have to be willing, and you can't give up."

"But Pervy Sage-" I started.

"You really don't know who you're talking to when you say that!" He yelled. "I'll have you know, I'm one of the three legendary Sanin!"

I blinked for a moment. "I knew that, Pervy Sage! But if your so awesome, why did you pick me to be your student? Do I have lots of potential?" I asked, grinning. "Come on, tell me!"

"Well actually, the Fourth Hokage was once my student. You bear such a striking resemblance it's hilarious. That's really the only reason." He scoffed slightly.

"I'm like the fourth?" I asked. "I'm closer then I thought!"

He growled, "The only thing you share is spiky blonde hair and pigheadedness! Now be quiet and listen!" He explained to me we were headed to an outpost town a ways from the main village. He said we would be traveling a while, and we could spend the night there after training. The rest of the day went on with us arguing and me annoying him. Then in the late afternoon, he saw a pretty girl (Perv, thus where his nickname came from,) and told me to go up to the hotel room he had rented, practice for awhile and sleep. Like I could sleep this early.

I still didn't know it. I still didn't know that within the next half hour, my life, and Sasuke's life, would take a horrible turn. I trained on focusing my chakra to different parts of my body with my clones, but they fell asleep. "When did you guys decide it was nap time?" I asked sarcastically.

Then someone knocked. Twice, very quietly. "Huh?" I leaped off the bed. "Did she dump you already? Three more knocks. Quicker this time. "I'm coming, geez." I dashed towards the door, and started scrambling with the lock. "Just let me unlock it…"

I still didn't know, and I was opening my door to it. I got the lock but the door didn't budge, so I pulled it open myself.

And I froze where I was. The next thing I saw surprised me so much, I gasped out loud. Jiriya? Not Jiriya. Sasuke? Not Sasuke. I thought that at first, seeing his eyes. But he was a lot taller. Then when I took more of the sight in, older. His hair was lighter than Sasuke's, yet still black. He was wearing a long black cloak, high enough in the neck so you couldn't see his mouth. But he had those same, bloody red, Sharingan eyes. An Uchiha.

But unlike Sasuke, he scared me. I knew nothing about him and he had done nothing, but he scared me. I couldn't move, either. Like the aura radiating off of him was meant to freak people out.

"Hard to believe such a naive child houses the nine tailed." Two footsteps was all it took to reveal another figure. He was wearing the same black cloak, which I noticed had red, white lined cloud patterns on it. But he was completely different. His skin was pale blue and his hair was styled like mine but shorter, and a dark blue color. He had a sword nearly, if not the same as Zabuza's. Huge. He was probably a foot and a half to two feet taller than the one with Sharingan.

Then the shock. They knew about Kyubbi. How did they know about that? Only the adults in the village, me, and obviously Sasuke knew about it, I was sure. These people certainly weren't from the village.

"Naruto, you're coming with us." The first one's voice sounded something like Sasuke's, even. Both his and Sasuke's voice were deep and fluid, and hid some kind of threat under every word.

I gasped again but didn't move. He knew my name. In any other situation, I would have fought and showed off - even if I had to resort to using Kyubbi - and escaped. I wouldn't have been going through with this. But something about him, something of him made me unable to move. Made me scared. Horrified.

"Why don't we take a walk?" He stepped to the side a ways, and maybe involuntarily, I stepped out into the hallway. I couldn't think of much else to do. Had I not moved, they could have done anything to me. Anything.

"Itachi, we wouldn't want this kid running off. Maybe I should cut off a leg, so he can't get away." I took a step back, but that made me shake, so I stayed still. His name was Itachi. Hadn't I heard that before? I know I had.

Itachi didn't answer, just kept his unemotional mask. "Right," The taller one said, lifting his huge sword. Oh god, why won't my legs work?

_Kit, Move!_

I can't!

_  
What do you mean you can't?! I told you to move!  
_

The sword got half way through the air, and Itachi spoke, causing the owner to stop the path of his blade. "It's been awhile." He paused, and I looked around, all but behind me of course, refusing to take my eyes away from them. "Sasuke." I still couldn't turn, but I knew he was here. Sasuke was behind me.

The rest of the events were complicated.

After little conversation, I knew why things would change so dramatically. This man who scared me, was Sasuke's brother. _The brother._ The one he lived only to kill.

Maybe that wasn't so bad. He was here, right under Sasuke's nose. But I later realized that I was wrong. I thought maybe Sasuke would be able to put up a good fight. He did. But Itachi was immensely powerful. He shook Sasuke off like he was nothing. A fly, or a toddler. I got to see him use Chidori like he had said, and it looked like he had already mastered it. Cool and as powerful as it looked, Itachi stopped it like it was an overly slow punch. Then he broke Sasuke's arm, drawing out a pained scream.

Every time I tried to help him, he'd just yell at me to stay away. He wanted revenge, and he wouldn't be satisfied if he couldn't do it himself. It was infuriating. Despite how Sasuke tried to get his attention, all he got was beat up. All Itachi seemed interested in was me.

But why me? I didn't even know him. At one point I tried to help Sasuke, but the taller one, - who by more conversation I learned was named Kisame - stopped me. He came close to slicing me again, but then Jiriya came.

Itachi had used his Sharingan, - god only knows how much you could do with it - and hypnotized the woman from earlier to get Jiriya away from me.

Still, Why?

And why Sasuke? Why did it have to be us? Him to be put through all of this, and me to be, whatever? Then Itachi explained. His organization, Akatsuki, whoever they were, had ordered him and Kisame to capture me. They wanted Kyubbi. I was like a super weapon to them. Jiriya threatened to kill Itachi and Kisame, but Sasuke had other plans. Shaky and with a broken arm, Sasuke asked - more like ordered - Jiriya to stay away, and he did.

Itachi still wasn't interested, but continued beating up Sasuke anyway. One of his kicks sent Sasuke flying towards the end of the hall, and into the concrete. He could have broken bones in his back.

I tried to help him more, but he didn't want it. I stood and watched, grinding my teeth together. This was the worst part. Sasuke still hadn't had enough, even after being thrown into the wall. Itachi granted what he wanted, and proceeded to slaughter him. Jiriya had to hold the collar of my shirt. I growled and trembled. I wanted to make him stop so much. With a stream of powerful, scream causing punches, Sasuke's neck cracked and his ribs broke. He was bleeding from the throat and nose. He finally had enough, dropping to the ground.

When he had enough, Itachi hadn't. He lifted him off the ground, and slammed him against the same wall. I couldn't see what was happening, but Jiriya still didn't let me go.

A minute passed, and I thought for a few terrifying seconds near the end, Sasuke was dead. He wasn't dead. Someone dead couldn't scream that loud. He screamed three times as loud as I had in my dream. He did it over and over again.

Kisame said something I couldn't hear, but I really couldn't hear anything but screaming. Fed up, I ripped away from Jiriya, and bolted across the hall towards Sasuke. I passed Kisame, who was about half a second behind me when he pursued. I could get there…He wouldn't catch up…

No, I had no idea what I would do.

Itachi turned, and I caught glance of Sasuke. He had stopped screaming. Then my feet got stuck in something, and neither I nor Kisame could move. Jiriya had summoned a jutsu that made the walls and the ground sticky. Leaving Sasuke to be swallowed by the wall, Itachi and Kisame tried to run and escape. They were out of my line of sight when I heard something similar to an explosion.

Jiriya chased after them, and I followed him. We reached the end of the hall way, and sure enough there was a hole through the wall. They were gone. Surrounding the hole they had made were pitch black flames, which I got too close to so Jiriya yelled at me.

He sealed the flames in a scroll, questioning their color and Itachi and Kisame's ability to break through, and then said, "Now Sasuke."

As Jiriya's wall's deteriorated, then began to disappear, Sasuke started to fall from the sticky wall.

"Sasuke!" I dashed over towards him, he didn't answer. I caught his fall and lowered him more smoothly to the ground, setting him up against the wall. I kneeled in front of him. I had expected it, but he was completely unconscious. I thought maybe the pain sent him in to shock, but it wouldn't have knocked him unconscious that quickly. His eyes were open but glazed, and he was still bleeding from the mouth.

Then I froze, a kunai flying in between Jiriya and I. In the most graceful, (or ungraceful, it's more opinionated,) way possible, someone I hadn't expected at all appeared and kicked Jiriya in the face. Gai-Sensei.

After stopping Jiriya's one nose bleed not from perverseness - for once, and Gai's apologizing, we were back to the situation. "Sasuke needs to be sent to the medical core at once." Jiriya ordered.

"Right," Gai replied.

"His left arm and rib's are broken. He also suffered, perhaps extreme, psychological damage from an eye, genjutsu technique." He explained.

"Pervy Sage," I asked, leaning to look closer at Sasuke. His eyes seemed to be solid, and you couldn't distinguish pupil from iris, or iris from the rest of the orb. Even the whites were black. I wanted to do more, but I didn't need either of them to know about my feelings. "Is Sasuke…Going to be okay?"

"Physically yes, but I'm not so sure about the mental damage. That could do as much as kill him, or as little as keep him out for an hour. I don't know." He answered. Remembering the scene from earlier, I wasn't surprised that man had killed his clan. He was unbelievably powerful, and I was afraid of him. Now I realized more and more, I wasn't afraid, I was furious. First reason being he was the cause of Sasuke being in so much pain, and I don't mean just from today. He's the one Sasuke seeks revenge on.

The reason I can't drag Sasuke away from his hate. This whole encounter was a reminder for Sasuke.

Another reason being, they wanted me. No, they wanted Kyubbi. I knew how powerful I was, and up until now, had not known villainous people would desire my power. "What…What did that bastard do to Sasuke?" I growled. "He never did anything to deserve this! I'll admit I was really scared back there, but I'm not now! Next time I'll fight them! They want me, don't they?! I'll happily go to them!"

Jiriya sounded annoyed. "If you follow them, all you'll get is killed. You're much too far apart. It was hard just getting them away from you."

"Are you suggesting I hide from them forever!?" I screamed back. "They aren't done with me, they'll come back!"

"Shut up for a moment!" He yelled, his patience lost. I did shut up, and turned my head back to the sleeping Sasuke. "You're weak." I shook at the words, but kept quiet. Instead of saying I was lower then they were, he came out with the truth. I was weak. Compared to them, him, almost everyone in the village, and maybe only better then the girl Genin in my graduating class.

"I'm sorry Gai," He changed subject. "I took the boy's feelings into consideration, but I should have stepped in sooner. He wanted to take Itachi down on his own."

"Kakashi…Suffered from the same technique earlier this morning." He said. The last part was rushed.

"Kakashi, too!?" I asked. He nodded.

"Oh, come look at this, for a moment." Jiriya motioned to Gai to come down the other hall and see the wall. Maybe if he had seen the eye technique, he could have seen the black blaze as well. I had only an adult-sized conversation's time alone. Adult sized conversations were small.

"You reckless idiot," I knew Sasuke couldn't hear me, but I spoke quietly to him anyway. "You should have given up before things got this far." I almost said, I wish you would forget about Itachi, revenge…but that sounded like saying forget about your ambition. Ironically he couldn't hear me. The talking was for my benefit.

But I did want him to forget. It was more or less selfish, but I wanted him happy. To always be here. I wondered if this reminder would have a big impact. Unfortunately, even though I didn't know it, it would. "If you die, I'm never going to forgive you. Or Itachi." I mumbled. I kissed the side of his face, mostly again for my own benefit. I wish he was conscious enough to know.

"Now hurry, I told you what I had planned. If his training goes well, and she cooperates, this won't take more then two months or so." I heard Jiriya's voice ring louder, coming back. I got up to my feet, wondering, she who?

"She?" I asked. "She who? What are we doing?"

"Going to find someone to fix up Sasuke," Jiriya answered. "Another of the three legendary Sanin. Tsunade. While we search, I'll teach you that jutsu."

I nodded smiling, trying to ignore the body behind me, but it was ridiculously hard not to. "Okay…but I heard you say two months."

"I don't know where she is, and your training will be extremely difficult. Two months at minimum." He answered. Two months without Sasuke.

Minutes later we were outside of town. Gai had the unconscious Sasuke over his shoulders. "I'll get him back into Konoha, and I'm sure he'll be just fine." Gai assured, mostly me since I was starring at him, saddened I would have to be away fro so long without him knowing.

"And we'll find this Tsunade person," I answered, since I had learned her name beforehand. "No question!"

We went separate ways, waving. Jiriya and I started down the path further away from Konoha. We walked for a few minutes in silence, and then he said loudly, "I saw that, you know."

"Saw what?" I asked defensively, dreading the answer.

"You can tell me your feelings. I won't judge you." He scratched the back of his head, and used a tone that sounded like we were talking about the weather.

"I don't know what you're talking about!" I growled back, but I was having a hard time resisting. I trusted Jiriya, but I didn't know what he'd think, or how he'd react.

"Are you really going to make me say it out loud?" He asked, annoyed.

"_Yes_! Because I have no clue-"

"I saw you kiss him, so why were you hiding it?" He asked, sincerely, but I was too embarrassed to notice. The 'K' word.

"Because everyone else seems to think that's weird!" I answered. "Especially for a girl perv like you! How could you possibly - " I started.

"Well master pervert or no, I've never had a relationship in the course of love with anyone. I'm on the outside looking in, and things like that don't bother me. I don't see why other people make such a big deal about it." I knew he was referring to the people in love, not the people observing. Why _did_ I make such a big deal about it?

He cleared his throat, "Gai um, might have, you know, saw too," His voice was more joking.

"You guys _suck_." I said under my breath, but I smiled a little now.

Chapter 20:


	21. Sorry

MORE TIME SKIP! But mostly because there is no Sasuke and that would be boring. D:

I've never done anything so physically demanding in my life. My mind was divided into three sections, aside from the parts that made my body process. The sections were Sasuke, learning this technique, and finding this Tsunade person.

Sasuke. I worried about him the most. He must have woken up at some point - I hope - and it would be roughly two months before I would be home. It could be more, that was just Jiriya's estimate. I wanted to tell him I was okay. I wanted to know his reaction to Itachi. I wanted to know what was he doing. I wish I knew.

And this goddamn jutsu. It was totally awesome. I had seen Jiriya do it to stop some thugs when we were hanging out around town before training started. But it was single handedly the hardest thing I've ever tried to learn.

As for Tsunade, well, I don't know anything about her, and Jiriya's descriptions of her make her sound like a old witch. Aside from the fact he said she was young and beautiful looking. She was as old as he was, but she had formulated a jutsu to keep her youth. Also, Jiriya seemed so engrossed in finding her, I thought it must be for more reason then to help Sasuke and Lee.

Over the course of only one month, way too much happened to take in and explain in full detail. The main points are we found this Tsunade girl, that Sound ninja came again, and Jiriya informed her the village needed her as the fifth Hokage. This girl the fifth! She didn't even want the job, and she didn't deserve the title either. But apparently, she was one of the three Sanin, and someone the village elders trusted and appointed.

As for that sound ninja, his name was Orochimaru. I found out thanks to Jiriya and Tsunade both. Some kind of relationship use to link those three together, I could tell by the way they talked about him.

Orochimaru had been wounded when he fought the third. His arms were paralyzed, and went into a rotting like state. Tsunade, being a master medical ninja, could heal them. She knew Orochimaru was bad, but Orochimaru had asked her to heal his arms, and the reward would be his forbidden jutsu to bring back Tsunade's little brother and love. They had died previously.

She may have gone through with the deal, had Jiriya, Shizune, (her maidservant and cousin,) and I not told her otherwise.

Kabuto - A servant or subordinate to Orochimaru like Shizune was to Tsunade - and Tsunade fought, and protecting her, I mastered my jutsu. I could make a clone to produce the jutsu in my hand. Rasengan. It required spinning chakra into a ball on the exterior of the palm of your hand, and keeping it continuous.

In the end, Orochimaru got away, and Tsunade accepted her position as Hokage. She even promised to help Sasuke, Kakashi, and Lee. While still keeping her snobby, bitchy personality in check, she really was alright. She even told me to keep believing, and become Hokage!

But really, Orochimaru…He must want Konoha bad. Or maybe something else.

There were more twists and ties to that story, but it's pointless to tell. In the present, Tsunade, Shizune and I were headed to the infirmary in the hospital, like she had promised.

We found Sasuke's door open, the same room from the last time I had visited him in the hospital, and she stepped in. I drew back slightly for a moment. I hadn't seen him in a long time, and I wondered if he would be alright. Sane. "Can I come in?" She asked, though she had already entered the room.

"Uh…Who are you?" I expected it, Sakura's voice, but despite her surprise, she sounded hurt. If Sasuke was awake, I felt bad for him. I followed her in, finally, and realized I would have better things to feel bad for him over.

Sasuke was _still_ unconscious, though someone had shut his eyes. I knew he wasn't asleep. Our loud voices would have roused him if he was asleep, or at least, the new voice, if he had been faking. All that time, and he never had regained consciousness. He had never been able to thought process about Itachi coming, and though he would remember, I still had awhile.

"Hey Sakura, Sasuke will be fine! Tsunade can help him!" I tried not to look too worried about him, but it was barely working.

"Can you?" She asked, a hint of desperation in her voice. She must have been with him most of the time. She stared up hesitantly at the blonde woman.

"I'll see what I can do," Tsunade replied, smiling. Then she closed her eyes in concentration, moving towards Sasuke. She lifted her hand above him, holding it a centimeter or two from his forehead. Then emerald colored chakra poured from her hand, letting out a low, hardly noticeable buzzing. It took a few minutes, and Sakura and I got fidgety, yet Tsunade seemed to stay focused. Then abruptly, she pulled her hand away.

"Uu…N…" Sasuke's eyes twitched and he shook his head back and forth. Then his eyes fluttered open and he stared up blankly before shakily pushing himself to sit up. He seemed to process where he was.

"Sasuke!" I cried, and Sakura did the same thing. She stepped forward and tossed her arms around him, but he didn't budge. His eyes were glazed as before, but he seemed more alert. He had a blank expression, too.

He was probably taking it all in.

Sakura stayed latched on, but he didn't seem to care. He was watching the wall directly behind her, and he hadn't noticed me. That was good. It hit me when Sakura wouldn't let go, and she started to cry, that it wasn't a fair secret to hide from Sakura. She liked, loved, whatever, Sasuke too much. Keeping it a secret only made it harder for all three of us.

I backed up a few steps, turned, and motioned towards Tsunade. "You've still got two more!" I reminded her.

After doing the same as she had for Sasuke to Kakashi, (with much more lecturing,) and disappearing to look at Lee, I went back to Sasuke's room. He was sitting up further, and his legs were out of the sheets. He was sitting on the edge of one side of the bed. Sakura had headed home, after hysterically thanking me and Tsunade. She had been here a long time. A few seconds passed. I sat in the chair next to the side of Sasuke's bed. This way, we were sitting across from each other, since he was sitting up and on the bed now. "You're such a wreck. You go to the hospital way too much!" I said in a bright voice.

"Where is he?" Sasuke said it so quietly I couldn't hear.

"Sasuke?"

"Where? Where is he?" He said louder.

I knew who he was referring too, so I refrained from asking. "He's long gone. You've been out for nearly a month." I answered, a tiny bit shakily. I feared his reaction. I was happy it hadn't been two months I was gone.

His expression got angrier. "He's _gone_?"

I nodded sluggishly.

"He could have taken you. He wanted to take you." Sasuke ground out between gritted teeth. "Away. From me. I didn't know…If you were…" He seemed to be talking in cropped sentences to restrain himself from emotion.

_Something is wrong with him, kit._

_  
What do you mean?_

That other Uchiha…It's because of him. Sasuke's aura is obsessive. Crazy.

_Sasuke wants to kill him. Itachi killed his clan and family._

_Now he wants you._

_Huh?_

Now that he's taken Sasuke's family, the fact that he wants to take you away is probably pushing Sasuke over the edge. He knows he'll be after you.

_The most important thing to Sasuke is his revenge._

_  
Not you._

I snapped out of Kyubbi and my conversation, and attempted to calm him. "But they're gone! I'll be just fine! It's not like anyone would let him get away with - "

"He wants you." Sasuke hissed, fisting the sheets underneath him. His eyes were half lidded and crimson. The Sharingan, a rage reactor. He probably hadn't intended for it to activate.

_You're right, Kyubbi._

"Calm down, please," I tried, reaching out to touch it face. "I'm here, and he's gone, so - " Then I abruptly ripped my hand away at his next movement.

"That's the point! He's gone! I couldn't kill him!" He yelled, then he slapped his hand to a spot between his neck and right shoulder, and squeezed. "I couldn't do anything! You watched!"

"Sasuke, Shhhh, we're-" In a hospital, is what I might have said, but he seemed to calm down a bit. His eyes deactivated, his body relaxed, and he dropped his hand. "Does you're neck hurt?" I asked, gently, trying not to piss him off again.

"A little. But it's fine." His voice was still a rage, and still shaking.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. "But you don't have to kill him. You could always just forget about reven-" It was definitely the wrong thing to say, at the wrong time. I hadn't exactly been thinking about his condition when I had worded it, although it is what I believed, what I wanted.

"What'd you say, Naruto!?" He snarled.

"I didn't say - " I started. But I had. There was no other word in existence that began with reven-. "I didn't finish - " That's even worse! Just stop…!

"Don't ever say it again." He demanded, relaxing.

I gulped and bobbed my head. "O-okay."

I stared across from myself at him, but he was looking down, at his feet now. Probably thinking. Considering what he would do now, or how to get to his brother. I worried. This lasted for a few moments. Then I stood up, took a step forward and put my hands on top of his, which were fisting the mattress cover. "I'm sorry, Sasuke." I half whispered.

A few more long moments passed, and his hands slowly uncurled, and he rested against his palms. Once they had relaxed, he lifted them over my shoulders and pulled me against him. Forgiven? Not exactly. I wrapped my arms around his waist in response.

"I know. But I'm not."


	22. Bite

I know it's impossible to make a person forget about there family being murdered. I didn't want that. If it happened to me, I would never be the same, and no one could ever make me forget. Not even remotely. But there was probably no person on earth bent on avenging that murdered family like Sasuke was.

Sasuke got out of the hospital with only slight weakness to the legs. Sometimes he would shake when he stood still, but his body had recovered quickly. His physical condition probably hadn't even crossed his mind, however. It was weird, but he watched me like I was his child that might get kidnapped. That wasn't too far off, either. I didn't know where Itachi was now.

It was later at night when the hospital let Sasuke go. Past dinner, but we ate since we hadn't yet. He probably hadn't eaten real food for a long time, anyway, just nutrients in his coma.

I started thinking about what may have happened during the Chunin exams. Right now, I should be considering other things, but I still felt like I was missing something vital. I never found out where the black marks on Sasuke's skin came from during battles. Maybe the missing time frame from the exams and the marks on his skin were tied together. They _did_ start happening right after I woke up. But how did they get there? That was what I was missing. Despite the tension, I decided to ask him.

I was in his room, for once not needing organized, and he had just came back from taking a shower. His hair was dripping wet, and he had more comfortable clothes on. "Um…Sasuke?" I asked, trying to make it sound like I wasn't actually interested. I was sitting on his bed, and he was toweling his hair.

"Hn?" He still had a tense tone of…well, he hadn't spoken much, so tone of copyright monosyllabic sounds. He hadn't loosened up since the hospital.

"Remember when I was knocked out, back during the Chunin exams?" The last part came out rushed. He stopped the circular motion of the towel, looked up, and nodded. "Actually, forget that," I said, thinking of something better.

"You're hiding something." He muttered. "You're twiddling your fingers."

I looked at my lap, and I was. Damn, I was as bad as Hinata. She did that. I laid one on top of the other, and kept them still. "Where did those black marks that form on your skin come from?"

He nearly dropped the towel. I must have caught him off guard. Lying won't work. Now he had to tell me, or not tell me. "Why do you care?" He practically breathed it.

"Why do you _think_ I care?" I answered, feeling more confident. At first it seemed like he'd be willing to tell me.

"I'm not telling you," He answered half heartedly, continuing with the towel. He wouldn't. That meant it was something bad. Something he didn't want me to be a part of, or worry about.

I breathed out instead of yelling, and tried, "Why not?"

"It's not your concern." He answered simply, but his face was somewhere else. He looked upset, and he seemed to be deep in thought, his wheels visibly turning. But not about this. About something else, something completely different.

"But it was painful, I've seen them! What are they from?" I begged, trying to ignore the strange stare.

"I can't tell you," He changed from I'm 'not' to I 'can't.' I must have hit a nerve, somewhere. "So stop asking."

I had another idea to make him crack. I was probably hitting below the belt, and it probably wouldn't make his attitude any better, but it could _probably_ work. "Sakura will tell me, if I ask her."

He stopped again, this time throwing the towel at the laundry pile in the corner. I couldn't clean that, he said he just did it when he needed clothes again.

"Why do you care?" He asked again, his eyes flashed and focused on me this time.

"Because, I have a bad feeling. I feel like I missed something, something vitally important. Lately," I felt a new conversation coming on. "You've been so obsessive! Ever since we met Ita…chi," I almost didn't finish because his eyes got narrower. "You've been acting hostile! To me, and to everyone else! I know it's because you want to kill him and you couldn't, but it has to be more than that! What's wrong?!" My voice broke near the end.

His angry expression didn't change this time. He didn't even flinch. "I love you. But you're a flyspeck of importance to me when it comes to him."

The worst part was the words, against his expression. I stood up, and dashed to his closet, hiding my current expression from him. I didn't second guess. I pulled out my jacket and my headband and tossed them on sloppily. "I'm going to Iruka's." I lied, because that wasn't what I was going to do. But I still seemed convincing, or rather, was convincing, because I was extremely hurt, and on the verge of screaming.

"Sure." His tone didn't change, and he stayed unmoving. Minutes later, I was out of his house, district, and on my way to Sakura's.

_I wish Itachi was never born, I wish Itachi was never born, I wish Itachi had never been born, keep that in your head…_Kyubbi gave a higher than usual growl that sounded like the human equivalent of a sigh.

Besides her frequent talking to Sasuke, our bond had gotten better. She respected me more, in the sense I wasn't just an annoyance. She seemed to care. She was my best friend, (Sasuke being boyfriend _and_ best friend, automatically higher,) and I couldn't deny that. But even now, I hope me coming by her house in the middle of the night wouldn't throw off my entire plan. I walked a ways, and it wasn't until I reached the door of her residence that I realized it was late, I had no means of weaponry with me, and Itachi was after me. Any other time I wouldn't have worried, but I didn't have anything that would even stand a chance against Itachi.

I swallowed and knocked, three times, loudly. Some time passed before she opened the door. "Yeah, who's-Naruto? Is something wrong? it's really late - " Sakura started as she opened the door. She had a nightgown on. Crap. She had probably been asleep, but this was worth it.

"Sakura, I need to talk to you. I think the ramen shop is open for another hour. _don't_ think of this as a date, I'm serious." I tried to sound pleading, needy.

She blinked, surprised. "Uh…I'm kind of -" She began, starring down at her bed clothes.

"Please?" I managed, beg. Beg…

"Ahm - " She must have seen my desperation. "I'll be right back."

"Yes! Thank you, Sakura!" I called as she dashed back inside. Two minutes later, she came back in a shirt and pants, probably unwilling to dress any more complicated. When we were at Ichiraku's, I bought two bowls, but she never touched hers. I ate occasionally, but I really just wanted to talk.

"So, what was so important you had to wake me in the middle of the night?" She asked, seeming concerned.

I figured it would be easier to just flat out ask. "Sakura, what happened when I was comatose during the Chunin exams?"

Her expression flashed from relaxed to startled. "Sasuke told me never to tell you, but-" The words spilled instantly. He didn't want me to know. He had taken the precaution of making Sakura keep it secret, too. It had to be bad. She flicked a strand of rose colored hair behind her ear nervously. "This is all because of that Orochimaru."

Orochimaru. Missing. Piece. Filled.

"When we were in the Chunin exams, after you passed out-" She began. I was surprised she told me so willingly. She must have been worrying about it too, but didn't want Sasuke to hold a grudge against her. "Sasuke fought with Orochimaru. He was winning, and Orochimaru did a jutsu so we couldn't move. He - " She shocked me, leaning over to eat some of the ramen. I did the same.

" - He bit him. Kind of like a vampire, but he didn't take any blood." She stated quickly, seeing me drop my chopsticks. "He left a weird black mark on Sasuke's neck…and he started to scream. He was in a lot of pain, and he had a bad fever. He passed out, and that's how everyone else got there. They were trying to help me fight off some Sound ninja, and then-" Her expression got worse. She paused for a while.

"Then what?" I inquired, for she seemed a little stricken and unable to continue.

"Then Sasuke regained consciousness. His entire chakra flow had been altered, and he had those black marks on his skin. They came from that bite on his neck." His neck. Today at the hospital, he grabbed his neck like he was in pain. "But more than just that power…" She continued. "Something was wrong with his eyes. Not like the sharingan, but…It was like he was insane. You've seen it." She added. "He gets so obsessed." She shook her head sadly. "The power, the energy, the darkness…It was incredible. We could all feel it radiating off of him. We could see it. He was mad." My vital piece of information I had longed for had finally come. But what Sakura didn't understand was that Sasuke wanted that power, and Orochimaru…

"I ran into Orochimaru, too." I mumbled, shoving the bowl away.

"You did? Where?" She asked, suddenly interested.

"When I was with Pervy Sage. He was bidding with Grandma Tsunade. He took her and Pervy Sage on at the same time. He was incredibly powerful, they would have lost against him had he not ran away," I breathed.

"This isn't good." She muttered, sadness saturated her voice.

"Don't worry!" I assured her, and she looked at me surprised. "Sasuke wouldn't give into that guy! He doesn't need help! He can get strong without him!" I really believed that he wouldn't. He knew he would be betraying the village, loosing his freedom, and leaving me all at once. She smiled weakly, but she didn't seem to believe it. She must have known more then I did. But I didn't doubt it. "Thanks Sakura, sorry I woke you up for that."

She nodded. "No, no, really. I was thinking about telling you that soon, anyway." She paused, fiddling with her chopsticks. "Can I leave now?" She asked playfully.

"Yeah," I left a tip on the counter, because the store was starting to close up. "I'm going to go home." She waved, and began walking towards home. I waved too, and as usual, waited until she couldn't see me before I began walking back to the Uchiha district. I sort of regretted leaving, but it's not like he wouldn't let me come back.

The only doubt in my mind, was that is for some miraculous reason Sasuke _did_ want his help, Orochimaru only wanted one thing.

Vessel bodies.


	23. Goodbye

I guess I wasn't thinking. I never took into deeper thought or consideration the rest of the night. Maybe I was tired. But in the morning, I would realize all of my mistakes. When I got back, his house was dark. He was nowhere in sight on the first floor. It made everything eerier, being nighttime.

I would regret being so naïve.

I trudged up the stairs, calling, "Sasuke?" But I didn't get any answer. I walked across the balcony, starring at the ground below. When I reached his room, the light was on. But he wasn't there. I didn't see his picture frame turned over, and I didn't pay attention to the fact that his traveling bag that I always had him hang up was completely absent.

I mostly wanted Sasuke to forgive me, and I wanted to take his mind off of Itachi, without mentioning it. Maybe he wouldn't forgive me at all. I saw a note similar to the one Sasuke left the day Itachi came on the nightstand. I picked it up and read it. His hand writing was messy, and there were erase marks, like maybe he had originally had a lot more on there. Then he trashed it and started over.

_Went training. Goodbye, Naruto._

I slapped it back down on the nightstand. "Sure," I muttered. I pulled my jacket off, and hung it up in his closet. Then I changed into night clothes. I crawled into his bed, assuming he would be back when he had finished training. The fact that he already took a shower tonight may have crossed my mind, but I didn't take it into much consideration.

_The Uchiha isn't here?_

Nope. He's out trainning.

_Why so late?  
_

_Shut up, I'm tired. He can handle himself._

_  
_I probably should have been listening to Kyubbi, too. But he did stop, and I fell into deep sleep, dreaming about Itachi dying brutally. I woke up to bright light and loud knocking. So loud, I could hear it from upstairs. I knew it was on the door. Maybe Sasuke locked himself out or something. "I'm coming, I'm coming." I called. Like they could hear me. I dashed down the stairs, nearly falling. I still had bed hair and pajamas, but that didn't phase me.

When I got to the bottom of the stairs, and was about to open the door, I remembered Itachi. Maybe I was just being paranoid, but I opened the door only an inch to look. It was the last person I had expected to see. "Shikamaru, What are you doing here?" I gawked. But no doubt, I wasn't hallucinating, it was him. Tall, skinny - lazy - chestnut-haired Shikamaru.

"I should be asking you that." He peered over my shoulder.

Oh _crap_. In pajamas and everything. "Uh…I'm living with Sasuke. Kakashi ordered us to live together, so we would get use to working together. We argue a lot." Uh-huh, _that _makes perfect sense. How convincing.

He stared more seriously at me, ignoring my stumbling. He made a point that he wasn't joking around. "Well, I came to inform you Sasuke's gone."

I tilted my head. "Huh? Yeah, he's not here right-" I tried to say, but he cut me off, like he already knew I was clueless.

"Sasuke left the village last night. Lady Tsunade's guard found Sakura crying near the gates this morning. He's gone with Orochimaru, we're pretty sure."

Crash.

"H-huh?" I asked again, shaking my head back and forth.

"He's left." Like he really thought I hadn't comprehended.

"What?" I begged again, choking, almost gasping.

"What's-" Shikamaru started.

"He went with Orochimaru." It wasn't a question. It would hurt my pride to cry infornt of Shikamaru. So I settled for getting pissed off, instead. Sasuke left the village. He was going to Orochimaru. I should have seen the deeper meanings. I should have worried. The note, with goodbye, Naruto. He went out to 'train' after he had already gotten cleaned up. He had been acting horribly lately. He was nowhere in the house when I woke up. The picture frame, the bag, _Oh…_

Sasuke was gone. He left the village, his freedom, and me.

"Jerk! Jerk! Jerk! I can't believe he'd do that! He can do just fine without-" I continued yelling, rambling, and on the verge of breaking something, but Shikamaru stopped me.

"We can't just let him get away. He has a lead, but it won't be too hard to catch up. While he's leaving, he's betraying us. Orochimaru just wants to use him against Konoha. It's vital we bring him back. Tsunade elected me to lead the mission. I can only recruit Genin, so are you in?"

He spoke so quickly, and I was thinking so hard, it took a while to take in. "Yeah! I'll be right back!" I bolted back into the house. I ran upstairs, changed at breakneck speeds, grabbed a pouch, filled it with kunai, soldier pills, and anything else small I could find, then ran back out the door.

"That was fast." Shikamaru murmured, shaking his head. "We need to go pick up a few others. We'll be out of here in an hour."

Within only about thirty minutes, ahead of schedule, we had gathered Choji - Shikamaru's male teammate and best friend, who was a little on the heavy side, okay a lot - Neji - Lee's team's superior, stubborn leader figure - and Kiba - a good friend of mine on another Genin team, and his puppy and faithful battle companion Akamaru. Lee - Gai's pupil and follower - had wanted to come, but he was still too disabled, and Shino - Kiba's teammate who was a little creepy - was out on another mission. All five of us were standing near the gate to leave.

"Show me what you're taking along," Shikamaru ordered. We all opened either pouches or backpacks and showed him our stock. "Good. Now listen. Kiba will be up front because of his smell and his knowledge of the geography." He continued to talk about our positions, but I wasn't listening. I nodded when he looked at me, and that was it.

The Sasuke that I started to know was the one behind his obsession with revenge. Underneath his obsession, he was a show-offy jerk. But when even that went away, he was broken and lonely like I was. He was stubborn and proud, kind, calm, smart, and comforting. He really was a normal human being, trapped in the life of avenging his family. As much as Sasuke was my boyfriend, crush, whatever…Even in the beginning when we hated each other, there was a deeper relation. Whether Sasuke and I loved each other or wanted to kill each other, we would always be bound in destiny. We were both alone, orphaned. We both knew what the other was going through. But the difference between Sasuke and I…

Is that he seeks hate and I seek love. We have the same problem, and are taking two paths from it. He wants to kill his brother, and chooses hate, even though all those girls and all the people in the village love him. And for me, even though it's slowly changing, most of the people in the village despise me. I'm trying to be better, and prove to the village who I am.

But I couldn't do anything, not even live, and I'd never forgive myself, if something terrible happened to Sasuke. If Sasuke was dead. If Orochimaru took Sasuke's body. I need Sasuke. He's my brother, my best friend, and my only one, all at once. And I don't think he knows it, but he needs me. If it weren't for Itachi, everything would be perfect.

Itachi is Sasuke's worst enemy, but he's also mine. He's the reason Sasuke is like this. So now, if it's the last thing I do, I'll bring Sasuke back. At the very least, ask him why he's leaving. He doesn't need Orochimaru. That could convince him, if my affection couldn't.

"Alright, time's running out." Shikamaru said sternly, breaking my thoughts. "Let's g-"

"Wait! Shikamaru!" A girl cried, and running footsteps filled our ears. We all looked up and turned. It was Sakura. Poor Sakura. "Shikamaru, let me join the mission! I can help." She begged, but Shikamaru shook his head.

"I'm sorry, Sakura. I can't take you." He said flatly, and a little gently. "I feel like there isn't anything you could do, and I wouldn't want to be responsible if something were to happen to you."

She wrapped her arms around her torso, hugging her upper body. She looked like she would cry. "Naruto," I nodded and stepped closer to her. "Please, I'm begging you. I tried to stop him, but I couldn't. You have to bring Sasuke back! You're the only one who can!" She pleaded.

Not just for myself, but for Sakura. For one of my best friends. "I swear I will, if it's the last thing I do." I answered. "I want him back, Sakura." She looked up, wiping her eyes and nodding.

"Ready now?" Shikamaru asked. Everyone nodded, Akamaru yipped enthusiastically. With that, we set off in the direction of Sasuke.

I swear, I'll bring you back.


	24. Ice

The rest of that day was a living nightmare. Only a short distance down the trail, we found a defeated Genma and Raidou. They had lost against Sound ninja who were traveling with Sasuke. They were planted there to keep anyone from taking Sasuke back. Apparently, there were four of them.

If they had beaten Jounin, we were screwed. Hesitantly, Shikamaru led our group farther. We caught up to the sound ninja, there was indeed four. We also learned they were carrying Sasuke in a barrel, for some strange reason we didn't know. To explain everything in full detail would be too hard. We left Choji behind early, he fought Jirobo -another heavy, yet tall figure - for us, to keep him stalled. Then Neji stayed behind to fight Kidomaru - a man with too many arms who looked a little like Iruka - They were two of the sound ninjas.

I thought we would seriously succeed at one point. We had the barrel. We had Sasuke. Shikamaru, Kiba and I dashed back to Konoha with it. Akamaru followed behind us laying traps. Akamaru was captured and wounded, so Kiba went back to help him. He battled with Sakon - a creepy, double bodied man - another stall. Then Tayuya - a snotty girl who carried a flute around - caught up to Shikamaru and I, and Shikamaru told me to keep going.

Then my hope started to dwindle when another one of Orochimaru's ninja took the barrel from me without a problem. His name was Kimimaro - a pretty, almost feminine man - and he was bent on bringing Sasuke - that barrel - to Orochimaru. Leaving Kiba and Shikamaru, I chased after Kimimaro and the barrel.

I finally fought him, but I was losing. To make things worse, Sasuke escaped from the barrel and ran off. Distracted, Kimimaro nearly killed me. But Lee, who had just recovered, showed up and saved me. He insisted I continue following Sasuke, since I had promised Sakura so, so I did.

Man, if one of us was a girl, this would be a much easier secret to let go.

So much more probably happened after that, but I wouldn't know. All I could hope for was that everyone would live. For the next few hours after that, I chased Sasuke. I couldn't see him until near the very end of the chase, but I knew I was following him.

Right now, I've caught up to him. We had reached the water boundary separating Leaf and Sound. There were two enormous statues, and he was on the one furthest away. They were…the founders of Konoha or something, I don't remember. The first Hokage and somebody else.

He stopped moving, so he must have acknowledged I was behind him. Maybe he wanted to get me out of the way. "Sasuke!" I yelled across the water. He continued walking, uninterested. "So you'll just run away!?" I growled. I might be able to talk my way through this.

He stopped, one foot in mid-step. He turned around, and the entire right side of his body was coated in those black wavy marks. His transformation must be going further, because his left eye was black with a yellow iris. "So you were stupid enough to follow me." I stared at him, unsure of what I should do. I tried to keep my composure. "Like I told Sakura already, it's over. We're over. Stay away from me." He's really serious. So serious he won't even consider what we were before this.

It wasn't right. I know it's not all his fault, but he led Sakura - and _me_ on to believe he cared about us. Like _we_ were the most important things in his world. Now he was like this, and with no explanation why he had changed. I knew it was because of Itachi, but he didn't have to leave, or be alone. I remembered something Haku - Zabuza's deceased male partner - said to me when we were in the land of waves. He said that only when you have something to protect, something important to you, are you the strongest you can be. "Why?" I said, just loud enough for him to hear. "Why are you doing this? To us? To _me_?" I begged. His expression changed to more serious then sarcastic. "I don't get it! Why!?" I screamed.

"It was stupid to tell you my feelings." He said flatly. I didn't need to question him any further on which feelings. "I'm done playing around with the worthless Konoha crowd. I need more power, and it's not coming from there."

"But…Shikamaru, Neji, Kiba, Akamaru, Choji, Lee…They all risked their lives to bring you back!" I screamed, defending my friends.

"That was nice of them." Sasuke replied. "I already told you, I'm done." He turned, and started walking, almost leisurely, again.

No. You aren't getting away so easy.

He must not have been prepared for it, (but hey, neither was I,) because he was caught completely off guard and did nothing to defend himself. He saw my shadow, turned all the way around, and that was it. I had leapt across to his statue and tackled him to the ground. We slid a few feet, and I ended up pinning him down with my knees. He never once tried to move. I grabbed the high collar of his shirt and jerked his head up.

"If I had stayed in Konoha with _you_," He was using the past tense, already assuring both of us he was leaving, without question. "I never would have gotten this strong. I'm going to Orochimaru."

I already knew, but it hit me twice as hard. Maybe this would convince him. "Are you crazy!? Orochimaru killed the third, and tried to destroy the village! All he wants you for is a body! If you think I'll let you go, and throw away everything you have, you're wrong!"

"That doesn't matter," He smirked. "All that matters to me is revenge, and if you get in my way, killing you will be an easy feat." He grabbed my collar and jerked me down, similar to what I had done.

He was still smiling. The impatience and anger had just turned into insanity, an easier emotion for the body to accept. "If you won't listen, I'll take you back by force!" I hissed. I wouldn't just be able to convince him. Violently and against his will would be the only way I could bring him back. If I could even do that. "I don't want to fight you," I added through grit teeth.

He shifted his hand so it was around my neck. "Too bad." He pushed his knee against my stomach, and slowly forced me up. I tried to keep him down, but his - perhaps new - brute strength was too much. Maybe he wanted to kill me. He lifted me higher and higher until my feet were off the ground, then even higher. I ended up with them a foot off the ground. I clutched at his arm, trying to rip him away, and at the very least, keep from choking.

He breathed in audibly, then let go. Three seconds later, my stomach was in pain and my body hit the water below us. Had that been a punch to the head, it probably would have knocked me out. He had never had that kind of strength before. It must be due to the curse mark.

After composing myself and catching my breath above water, I proceeded to get the shit beat out of me. My continued screams and pleads were futile, and I didn't try too hard to fight back. He can't be serious. He doesn't want to kill me. But it became clear that he did, when he told me so.

I had crawled out of deep water and balanced on the surface for perhaps the third time. "Do you want to kill me or something!? Does everything we had before this mean anything to you!?" I screeched up at him, for he was back to one of the statues.

"No. It means everything." He replied, lowering his head. "That's why I'm going to kill you." The words spilled out of his mouth, and I was speechless.

He wanted to kill me.

He wanted to kill me.

He wants to kill me! "Wh-" I tried to make a word, but I couldn't finish. "Wh-Wa-Why?" My voice was broken.

He rose his head. "That _is_ why."

He wanted to kill me. The thought would not leave my head. Even after everything, he wanted to kill me. For reasons I didn't know. Our fighting continued. I tried a bit harder, but I was mostly shocked. After a while, I just stopped moving. So did he, but his was probably just to wonder why. Was there really any worth in fighting him, or trying to bring him back if he wanted to kill me? If he didn't care about me? At all?

I balanced on the water with chakra, but I didn't bother doing anything else. He stopped his assault, and watched me for a moment. I forced my eyes shut. I didn't want to see what I could hear. The metallic, chirping sounds of Sasuke's assassination jutsu, Chidori.

I thought you really did care. I always wanted to be friends with you, from the moment I meant you. But you and I were so different, and you were better than I was. So I decided you were my rival. But rival or not, you were always something I wanted to be. When you told me your feelings and I discovered mine, I was so happy. You were the first person on earth to acknowledge me not because of what I was. You were my first real bond. And I thought I was yours, but…Does any of that mean anything to you? Were you lying this entire time?

The Chidori sounds grew louder, and he was so close, I could feel chakra radiating from it. The hand that obviously wasn't harboring the Chidori reached behind me and twisted through my hair.

It was like my dream all over again, but at least he didn't want to kill me because of Kyubbi. It was much worse. I didn't know why he wanted to. How unfair.

But he didn't pull, he pushed. I moved one foot backwards, shocked now, but it wasn't enough to get away. He pushed my face forward, and it didn't surprise me as much as I thought it would. Only a little.

His lips were flat and closed, and cold as ice.


	25. The End of The begining

It was a crappy first kiss. First kiss that wasn't an accident, anyway. It was like kissing someone made of stone, only much smoother. Stone wasn't this soft. The kiss itself was hard and firm, but the texture of his lips wasn't.

You'd expect your first kiss to be a little shy, sweet, warm, and long lasting. It may even lead to deeper things. Did killing them count as 'deeper'?

He pulled away, but I still didn't open my eyes. His hand went all the way through me, but I grabbed at it, and he hit my lung instead of straight on. I didn't wait a second before entering my sub-consciousness, and now I had given up my body completely for Kyubbi to use, so there wasn't much pain, just a difficulty in breathing, what with only one lung.

_Kyubbi, hurry._

_  
I know, kit. This Uchiha and I are going to have _problems_ if you let him live._

_Before my body dies, please._

_I know, I'm going. Give me a second, you brat._

_  
_I opened my eyes, Kyubbi's chakra curtain starting to form. My wound started to heal, and my chest went numb. Sasuke had one hand wrapped around my neck, so I grabbed it and threw him away. "Guh-" He stumbled back after landing on the water, then watched my metamorphosis.

_Problems._

_If he thinks he's going to win so easily, he's got something else coming to him._

His eyes widened in the same moment my impalement began closing. "Sasuke," I snarled, my voice coming out strangely. "Even if I have to rip you apart, you aren't going to Orochimaru!" I screamed.

Everything else, well, you know how it goes. I tried convincing him. I tried telling him Orochimaru would take his body, but that didn't stop him. I tried telling him he didn't need Orochimaru's help, and he could get stronger here. He countered with how I was getting better, but he wasn't. I tried to tell him he was betraying his village. That he would be labeled a missing ninja. And that he would be helping Orochimaru in taking over. That didn't even begin to faze him. I even resorted to telling him he shouldn't go after Itachi. That his revenge was vain. It didn't help either. It made his anger and insanity worse. I kept fighting him. I was winning, for awhile. Then his Sharingan evolved, and I began losing again.

Before we started what could have been final blows, I told him how much I needed him. How much I cared about him. Not now, but the real Sasuke. The Sasuke behind all this crap. But in our darkest forms, Kyubbi and the final stage of his curse mark - which was a full bodied demonic _thing_ - we did start those blows. Only one of us would win. He would leave and I would die, or I would win and bring his beaten body back.

He started Chidori and I started Rasengan. We hit each other head on at the same time. At first we just resisted each other, but he suddenly shifted his blow. He hit my arm instead of my chest. I reached up and ripped my nails across his headband.

He had taunted me about how I would never scratch it, earlier. I'd lost, but he sparred my life, and then it poured down rain. That…was the last thing I remember for sure. But I could have sworn somewhere in the depths of my body, in my sub-consciousness with Kyubbi, That I felt his not so cold arms around me.

_Kit._

_Mmmm…Hmm…_

_You are with your sensei. Wake up._

_Where's-_

_  
Relax. I've been healing you for awhile, but you still aren't well enough to move._

That was when I realized it was really over. When I opened my eyes and saw trees instead of rocky cliffs, flying by at high speeds. When the sunlight burned my eyes, and not the cloudy haze, or electric sparks. It must have been the next morning. When I felt I couldn't move any part of my body without hurting. When I noticed I was on Kakashi's back, and we were moving so quickly.

Sasuke was gone.

But I asked anyway. "Kakashi?" I whispered, it was all I could manage. He tilted his head slightly back to look at me.

"Where's Sasuke?"

He closed his eyes and looked ahead again. I could vaguely hear voices around us. "Kakashi! How's Naruto?" One of them asked.

"He's in bad condition, but he'll be alright." He replied calmly. "How is the rest of the retrieval squad?"

"Shikamaru Nara suffered some minor injuries. Kiba Inuzuka suffered bone fractures, but his life isn't in danger. Akamaru as well. Neji Hyugga and Choji Akimichi are in intensive care, and their condition is unknown. What about Sasuke Uchiha?" They explained, ending on a bad note. I buried my face into the back of Kakashi's neck, and he didn't answer the men. We just kept going. I got tired and blacked out again.

_Kit?_

He's gone. I breathed it, it seemed, even in my mind.

_You don't need to put yourself in anymore danger over him. He's not worth it. He obviously doesn't care about you._

_No._

_Mm?_

_He does._

Kit…

_Even if he doesn't, I do._

_But…He wanted to kill you._

I didn't answer.

_I assume you aren't giving up?  
_

I shook my head back and forth, incredibly slowly. But even like that, it was a defiant answer.

_What about Akatsuki being after us?_

_Why do you worry? You're a giant monster fox.  
_

_I'm trapped inside a brat's body. What can I do? I have no control over who captures YOU._

I sighed sadly.

_If I was happy right now, I'd say, 'I'll kill everyone of those accursed Akatsuki members and Orochimaru, help Sasuke take his revenge, and bring him home!' I will either way, but I'm just not in the mood to phrase it like that._

He growled low, like maybe he was yawning.

_I'm sleeping. The infirmary can take care of you. I'm tired from fighting that boy._

_You aren't so bad Kyubbi._

_Shut up brat, I am a bloodthirsty monster._

_Of course you are._

I would have laughed if I wasn't on the verge of crying. I didn't have the energy to do either, though. I knew I'd cry eventually, but I was too tired.

I just had to fall in love with him. But I wonder if maintaining my love would be as easy as discovering and admitting it.


	26. Epilogue: Best Friend

I held in my hands the last piece of Sasuke I physically had. Kakashi said he found it beside me on the ground, and he offered it to me. It was his headband. His scratched headband. I sat somewhat upright in the hospital bed, with the headband in my lap. I ran my hands back and forth across the steel, feeling the familiar indent of the leaf village symbol, and - more carefully - the sharp, jagged line across it.

"I'm sorry." I managed in a small voice, my first round of breakdown over.

"You really should stop saying that," Sakura said with a small smile. She was sitting on the bench across from me in the hospital room. "It's fine. Just forget it." She was so good at fake smiling. I knew she didn't mean it. If any of Sakura's child crush on Sasuke had faded, it had only given way to more mature feelings. She loved him, and I knew this hit her hard, just as it did me.

"I won't forget about it," I answered. "I can't, I-" I started - or more like tried - to grin at her.

"I really don't want to see you get hurt over this. I'm telling you it doesn't matter." My grin faded. Sakura had to know. She had to understand. It was only fair. I loved her, she was my best friend, and if I told her later, it would only be worse.

"I _know_ it matters to you. That's why I won't break my promise. And not just for you-" I paused. "For me."

"I know Sasuke means a lot to you. But he could-"

"Sasuke and I were together." It was the most direct way I could think of, without making her question it anymore. She stared at me for a moment, opened her mouth like she would say something, then shut it again. Her expression was blank, but she was forcing it to be that way. My fingers traced the line from my slash, deep in the metal.

"Kakashi," She began quietly. "Hinted something like that." Her voice broke, just a tiny bit at the end. If she hated me now, I wouldn't have anyone.

"I'm sor - "

"I _told_ you to stop saying that!" She grinned at me placidly, suddenly. Like everything was alright, and she just needed a moment to get over it. "You have nothing to be sorry about."

"But you - "

"I know." She answered, only slightly quieter. "But you aren't giving up are you?"  
"Nope! I'll chase that sadistic bastard to the ends of the earth!" I tried to move my arm too fast to give her a thumbs up, but it ended in a cringe and a whimper of "Ouch!"

She smiled. "Then I'll be with you every step of the way, and support you however I can."

_The pink haired annoyance is being kind._

_Shut up, Kyubbi. She is not._

_Either way, brat._

With the help of Sakura, Kakashi - And a few others I haven't even _met_ yet, I knew this would work. It had to work.

I love Sasuke too much for it not to work.


End file.
